Cicely Posted June 21, 2022 Share Posted June 21, 2022 I have a friend who I started talking to at the beginning of this month and I think I have feelings for her but I can’t tell if it’s something different she’s into me and I think I feel the same but I can’t tell so how do I figure it out? I have been told to just date the same gender and see if you like it but I don’t want to hurt anyones feelings by doing that so is there a better alternative and if so what is it? Also I have been interested in a girl before. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted June 21, 2022 Digital Mentor Share Posted June 21, 2022 10 hours ago, Cicely said: I have a friend who I started talking to at the beginning of this month and I think I have feelings for her but I can’t tell if it’s something different she’s into me and I think I feel the same but I can’t tell so how do I figure it out? I have been told to just date the same gender and see if you like it but I don’t want to hurt anyones feelings by doing that so is there a better alternative and if so what is it? Also I have been interested in a girl before. Hi Cicely, welcome to the Ditch the Label community . I’m Aurora, one of the support mentors here and I give advice to those who reach out to us. Thank you for opening up about how you feel. It sounds like you’re very considerate of others and you don’t want to explore your feelings in case you realise that you don’t feel comfortable dating that person. Is that right? Have you spoken to your friend about this and explained to her how you feel and that you are unsure about your feelings? Do you think she might understand? Figuring out your sexuality can be confusing and it often takes time. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cicely Posted June 24, 2022 Author Share Posted June 24, 2022 Yes I told her that I didn’t know and I don’t want to get in a relationship and hurt her feelings cause I would feel horrible about doing it to her. Though recently I have been figuring it out and I told her i am bi and that it may change in the future but for now that’s what I would like to stick with. I now have strong feelings for her but I don’t know if she still has feelings for me and I have no idea how to go about asking her. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted June 24, 2022 Digital Mentor Share Posted June 24, 2022 12 hours ago, Cicely said: Yes I told her that I didn’t know and I don’t want to get in a relationship and hurt her feelings cause I would feel horrible about doing it to her. Though recently I have been figuring it out and I told her i am bi and that it may change in the future but for now that’s what I would like to stick with. I now have strong feelings for her but I don’t know if she still has feelings for me and I have no idea how to go about asking her. I’m so glad to hear that you have been able to have honest conversations with your friend. And it sounds like you are a lot more sure about your feelings now. I would imagine that this might be why you are feeling reluctant to tell your friend - having strong feelings for someone also makes us feel more vulnerable. You mentioned before that your friend is into you. Is there anything that would suggest that this has changed? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cicely Posted June 25, 2022 Author Share Posted June 25, 2022 Ok update, I sent her a very long message on how I felt about her and she asked me to be her girlfriend I said I want to say yes but I’m scared. So what do I do I’ve never been in a relationship before so I’m just scared of it like I don’t know how to date. Should I just go for it ?cause I don’t want to keep her waiting. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted June 27, 2022 Digital Mentor Share Posted June 27, 2022 On 6/25/2022 at 7:47 PM, Cicely said: Ok update, I sent her a very long message on how I felt about her and she asked me to be her girlfriend I said I want to say yes but I’m scared. So what do I do I’ve never been in a relationship before so I’m just scared of it like I don’t know how to date. Should I just go for it ?cause I don’t want to keep her waiting. Thanks so much for the update. I'm so impressed with how open you are with your friend. It's great that she feels the same and that you've then been able to tell her that you want to say yes but you are scared. It is totally normal to feel scared as you've never dated a girl before. Please don't feel any pressure to do anything you don't want to and take your time. I would suggest to keep doing what you're doing and keep telling your friend how you feel. Do you think she would be happy to take things slowly and give you the space to move at your own pace? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cicely Posted June 27, 2022 Author Share Posted June 27, 2022 Yes, I actually told her I’d like to date her but take things slowly as we do so she has said she is totally okay with that cause she would like me to be comfortable and doing so I’ve realized how happy I am with her MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted June 28, 2022 Digital Mentor Share Posted June 28, 2022 20 hours ago, Cicely said: Yes, I actually told her I’d like to date her but take things slowly as we do so she has said she is totally okay with that cause she would like me to be comfortable and doing so I’ve realized how happy I am with her That's so lovely to hear . I'm really happy for you. Is there anything else you need support with at the moment or are you OK? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cicely Posted June 28, 2022 Author Share Posted June 28, 2022 I’m okay for now thanks for all the help 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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