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Jubei    

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Hi, I joined cuz it felt like a safe place to talk about things ive been struggling with and just kinda a safe place in general, which i really need right now...ive reached out in other places and got responses too disgusting to repeat...so i hope this place is as nice as it looks on the outside.

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  • Ditch the Label Staff

Hey Jubei,

Welcome to our community! I'm sorry to hear you've had difficult experiences sharing in the past. Please do feel free to share on here, having a judgement-free and safe space is incredibly important to us here and you are more than welcome :) 

 

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Hey @Jubei

It's great to have you here. We look after our members here and treat them with respect. As Harper said, this is a judgement-free space and it's completely safe. We will be very supportive of you :)

How are things going? 

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On 5/26/2021 at 8:48 PM, Monsoon said:

Hey @Jubei

It's great to have you here. We look after our members here and treat them with respect. As Harper said, this is a judgement-free space and it's completely safe. We will be very supportive of you :)

How are things going? 

Thank you both...things went really bad this week, I stood up for someone when they got bullied for being "needy" and the bully and their best friend made me feel like an awful person for doing it, to put things simply, but its a super long story.

Ive thought about going back to therapy to get help dealing with everything in general but I feel stuck, cuz the only "free" ones betrayed me and i dont trust them, and going somewhere else I just cant afford.

I dunno...i just want to be happy again, and trust people.

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Hey @Jubei

Ahhh, sorry to hear that things have been really bad this week 😔. It sounds like you did the right thing, standing up for someone who is being bullied, so good for you. Sadly, some people don't react well to this and don't like the person doing this kind of good thing, but it's amazing that you did and you should be proud of yourself. You're clearly a good person ☺️

With the therapy, are there any cheap ones that you will be able to afford? There are places that do free counselling. If you tell me the city/town you live in, I could have a look for you. If you prefer, I can DM instead of talking here.

Can I ask, are you not feeling happy at all? If so, why do you think that is? When we have an idea about the reasons why, this can change our direction and lead to us sorting certain things out to get to a better place. I've just seen that you've made another post about your illness and relationship which I am thinking might be playing into this. Your situation must be really tough, but just know that we are here for you. You are not alone. I'm wondering, would you like to talk about that here too, or would you rather me reply to that topic separately? I'm happy to do whatever works for you.

Take care, Jubei. Speak soon. 

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I did work up the courage to call around and try to find somebody that could help me without taking all my money...hopefully within the next two weeks i'll get a call back.

We can talk about my illness over there, maybe it will help someone who is suffering from that kind of thing too and reading that forum.

As for my happiness...I don't even know. I'm so used to having to fake being happy to not get bullied or abandoned or treated like a "drama queen" just for saying my feelings. So I don't really know when I actually feel happy. Even if sometimes I think I am, I say "this won't last, it's temporary", and I'm always right...I can't let myself have a false sense of security, otherwise it's even more painful when inevitably Iose it.

I'm glad I can speak freely here...you guys are the real deal, and I appreciate it so much.

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Hey Jubei,

I'm glad that you feel like you can speak freely here. When we feel like we can be open and honest, we help ourselves so much in the process, so it's really good to hear that from you. I've just been looking at your other post about your illness and I wanted to thank you for sharing that with us. It must be hard to see people eventually pulling away by not coming over, nor responding to your texts. I just want to check in and see how you are feeling about everything? We are here for you if you want to talk.

When you say you feel like you're holding your boyfriend back, do you really believe that? I'm wondering, does your boyfriend have anything else going on which might have led to him going to see the therapist? Has he spoken to you about what the contributing factors are? I think it's easy to blame yourself here, but if you can, try to look at the bigger picture of his life as I'm sure you'll be able to identify other reasons why. Also, sometimes, people can be depressed for no reason at all, so try to keep that in mind.

I hope to hear back from you soon. Take care. 

 

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