Feeling disliked by friends

[Anahita]

Hi guys! Hope you’re all safe and healthy at this time.

I have been feeling very disliked by my friends. I feel like they don’t want to spend time with me, or like me at all. I am an introverted person, but people usually never notice because I’m not really shy when making friends. I can tell with confidence that I am a reliable, trust worthy friend who keeps her word. I keep thinking, maybe they don’t like me because I’m not as “fun� as their other friends are. I’m not a very loud person, but I’m not very serious either. I have my own sense of humour and I like to laugh too. These friends that I have, only come to me when they need advice, or someone to confide in or if they need help with something. When I am with them, nobody pays attention to me. Nobody really cares about me at all. My presence and absence really seems to make no difference to them at all.

Is there something wrong with me? Am I not likeable? I have friends from school, just a small group of friends with whom I share a great relationship. These are the friends I have in college. Will I ever find people who like me and value me? I want to feel special too. I make everyone feel that way even when their own friends abandon them when they need them. Why do I always get hurt? I’m already battling feelings of worthlessness and this is just adding fuel to the fire. I wish someone would give me a warm hug and tell me something kind.

[Remi]

Hello @Anahita,

 

Thanks for posting this really interesting question.

 

I hear that you are worrying if your friends really like you, that's a thought i'm sure we've all had, especially when we are struggling with our own self esteem, if we don't like ourselves, we wonder why anyone else would. You've said that your friends come to you for advice? This must mean they really trust and value your opinion. In any friendship group there are different types of people - there are extroverts and introverts and everyone has a different role . Have you tried bringing this up with any of them that you feel unheard?

 

You are not worthless, you are very important and very loved. The mind can play tricks on us when we are feeling low and convinces us that we are not worthy of love, and I promise it is lying. I would try reaching out to one of your friends and telling them how you've been feeling you may be surprised with their responses.

 

Have a read of this too https://us.ditchthelabel.org/are-the...est-otherwise/

 

Sending a warm hug your way!

 

Remi

 

[Anahita]

Hi Remi!

Thank you for your kind words! You’ve really made my day. I went through the article and I found that I see almost all the signs mentioned in it. I hope I can deal with them well and feel better real soon.

[Remi]

Hey @Anahita

 

I'm glad it could help. If you are noticing now that your friends are showing quite a few signs of not being there already. You just need to find your tribe. When you do you do you will know, because you will be able to feel like yourself and I think when you truly meet 'your' people you will be funny and interesting because they will allow you to be yourself.

 

What are some steps do you think you could take to feeling better at the moment?

 

Remi