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  1. Past hour
  2. Hello its just a few friendship problems and she wasn’t in school so I was just saying that I hope she feels better soon and her reply was thank you
  3. im doing okay today, just really tired etc. How about you? I think bigender would fit both but I don't want both I want one. I get happier being precieved as a boy, just my body isn't really co-operating. Idk wether it is dysphoria or just insecurity, all I know it's not fun.
  4. Today
  5. Hi Monsoon, I'm glad I told you. I did tell a friend and the doctor too a while ago so that's good. I should also add that the medication I'm on to stop my period, the contraceptive, the doctor said I might get spotting as it starts to work and unfortunately I woke up this morning to that nasty surprise. It isn't as heavy as a normal period for me would be so I'm grateful for that, it's still tough though because all I want is it to go away. But like my friend said, all it means is that the meds are in my system now and are (hopefully) starting to do their thing. I'm going to try and focus on that. Oh! also, last night, I think I took a big step in my gender journey. I'm still not 100% but last night I've decided to call the GP Monday and ask about microdosing testosterone and things. I think I might be trans. That's a big thing for me to admit because I've always been scared of being trans. I told my sister last night too which she took really well. But yeah, I'm gonna think on it more but it was kinda a little revelation last night haha. No, I haven't seen your support guide on self harm, could you link it to me? that'd be really helpful I need to pick myself up and start filling my day with things I want to do to help me distract myself. I have so many books to read and art stuff I can do and a podcast to work on, I just don't do it and it's so annoying. I agree with you though, I need to keep myself busy, schedule/break up my day into cool activities, keep my friends updated, and really take care of myself.
  6. Hey @shymagnolia Thank you for telling me about what's happened between you and your friend. I think that her reaction is definitely interesting, because from what you said about how she reacted when you first found out it was him, she seemed like it was all okay. I'm wondering, what do you think led to her having that reaction? I think you're absolutely right to keep in mind the difficulties that she has had with her mental health, and how these might impact her emotions and relationships. How are you feeling?
  7. Hey @BiShadow!23 Thanks for coming to us for advice at the Ditch the Label community. How are you doing? I saw that you asked about coming out to your parents, and I'm wondering, do you know how they feel about the LGBTQ+ community?
  8. Hey, Yeah, I totally get why this is stressful and upsetting for you. I noticed that you said it's been tough for you these days because of some problems, and I'm wondering, would you like to tell us about what's going on? Also, what did she say when she replied to you? I hope that she has told you what's going on and helped you to feel better about your relationship. Speak soon.
  9. Hey @Blue22031 Thank you for letting me know that you're okay. How are you feeling today? I hope you're doing a little bit better, but it's okay if you're not, and just remember that myself and the community members are here for you if you ever want to talk. I'm just wondering, are you accessing any support at the moment for your mental health?
  10. Hey @savannah Welcome to our community How are you feeling today? I just want you to know that it's completely normal to feel scared, and loads of people who are out look back and realise that their fears about what could happen when they came out actually didn't happen. Can I ask, do you feel ready to come out? It's totally okay to wait if you're not, and if the time isn't right for you, then it's okay to wait. Also, can I ask, are you able to tell me more about what you're scared of?
  11. Hey, Your research does sound interesting, and I hope you can share your findings with us when you've completed it Also, thank you for telling me more about the self-harming. It's pretty common for people to notice how it helps them to cope with all of those overwhelming thoughts and feelings, and I guess it's good to remember all of those other things that we can do to help ease our emotions. I'm wondering, have you seen our support guide on safer alternatives to self-harm? Also, yeah, it's definitely good to keep yourself occupied and try to help yourself as much as possible when struggling. I completely get that need to hide when something is troubling you, and by pushing yourself through it and still getting out there, you help yourself to not close off when struggling. What do you think?
  12. I wish they knew what kind of family i come from and how 'happy' i am/was
  13. Basically, if it is in the Bible, then that is how they feel about it. And even the New Testament is pretty clear on homosexuality. As I'm thinking about it, I know that they would never hate me, so that's a situation better than a lot of people out there, and in reality, the main issue I have is fear of conflict. Like I do everything I can to avoid confrontation about anything. They would definitely continue to love me, but they would never support this area of my life, I mean they would probably be very kind to any boyfriend I bring home, but they wouldn't truly accept our relationship as right and normal. So all in all, they take the stance that a lot of Christians take: "Hate the sin, love the sinner." And thank you for responding @Monsoon! I don't really ever get to talk about this part of my life with anyone that much, and it's been really great to finally get to. I am so thankful that I found this place!
  14. Yesterday
  15. Go for it! You only live once and so many people would love that! I would definitely read a lesbian werewolf story
  16. I met a guy on Hinge, and we went on 2 dates. Nothing untoward happened on those dates. I wasn't really feeling a chemistry, but he was really nice. After the second date, I started to wonder about some of the stories he told me. They seemed to overlap with some stories my best friend had told me about her ex from three years ago (a time when my best friend and I were not in contact). So I asked my bestie about it, and turns out that it's the same guy. We laughed about it a bit, and then I asked her if it was okay that I told the guy about our friendship. She said she didn't care. I texted that guy to end things amicably, and I brought up my friend - how much I care about her, and what a coincidence, etc. He told me to tell her hello, so I did ("[His name] told me to tell you hi, that you're really sweet, and he sees how you and I could be good friends! <3"), to which my friend essentially dumped me. She said, "Good luck with my ex! You knew it was him. I'm so over this friendship. This is the last straw." I live in NYC. There are a lot of men with similarities on these dating apps. I'm not thinking about my friends' exes let alone seeking them out. If this bit helps, that friend and I have been friends off and on since we were 12. In high school, though, she would often bully me with her older sister's popular mean girls group both irl and online. It's so confusing because she's so nice at times, but then she'll switch on a dime. And, when I really need a friend, she tells me I need help. When I ask for some comfort (verbatim), she recoils and says I'm being toxic. She's been excluding me from girls'nights, etc. And it feels like that high school bullying all over again. I know I didn't seek her ex out on purpose - dating a friend's ex is one of my biggest dealbreakers. I would never intend it. The part that makes me feel like a bad friend is that I sent the screenshot of my friend's text to a guy friend. This guy friend and I have only hung out twice irl, but we texted frequently. Usually it's just me venting daily frustrations - not with any real gravity but just trivial things. Anyway, he texted me a two-screen long message saying that my friend is right - that I need help, and he claims that I intentionally meant to hurt my friend by sending her that message about the guy. He said, "No person in the world would ever send that without intentionally trying to be malicious. If you really thought that you weren't doing anything wrong, then I don't know what to tell you. I highly doubt that you are that clueless." I didn't mean to hurt my friend. I didn't mean to date her ex. But having reinforcement from two sides makes me wonder if I did do everything on purpose. To be fair, my male friend is condescending often - not at like midnight when he wants me to come over, though. The night before this happened, he had invited me over again at like 1 am... and I said no, again. So I don't know if his jabs have other things going on. That said, all my other friends (and I do have many wonderful friends) and my family (my mom and sister) have been extremely supportive. They remind me of all the times that "best friend" has been mean to me and mistreated me throughout high school until now. That friend has been institutionalized twice in psych wards and diagnosed by a team of psychiatrists with bipolar and borderline personality disorder, so I try to keep that in perspective. But still - I've been losing sleep. I've been feeling like such shit about myself. Like perhaps I am a really bad person? I don't know. I don't know if I'm even making sense. Thank you for reading.
  17. @Monsoon it’s quite stressful and upsetting thinking about it as it’s been tough these days for me due to some problems and she wasn’t in school today and I was worried but she replied to my messages and I don’t have any of her friends numbers but I sit next to one of them in a class
  18. I like writing stories, I've been doing it for several years now. But I haven't really completed one. Or published any, but I want to now that I'm 18. I have some ideas that I think can work, but I'm worried about how friends and family who may want to read it will think of my work. I want to write a Lesbian werewolf love story, along with a merman and human girl love story, but I feel weird because I have never been in a relationship. I have never dated, nor even kissed a person like that. I love writing, but nowadays its harder to write and there is the fear. Mostly, I'm afraid that my stories will turn out to be too dark, and people will think I'm messed up in the head. Do I just go for it? I'm going to try, I'm really scared, but I'm gonna at least try. It may take me months, maybe even years, but at least in the end I can say I didn't just sit on my bum and wondered what could have happened if I had just tried.
  19. Please take the poll! Love ya!
  20. thanks I really need someone to talk to atm so thanks for allowing me to talk to you
  21. Hi so i need help with coming out I'm soo scared anyone have any advise???
  22. So, I have this internet friend who I've known now and been friends with for about 4 years now, but it's become increasingly obvious (at least to me) that our brains just aren't compatible. He's only 23 and he's in numerous gaming servers and stuff and works with children in a school, so you'd think he'd be pretty on it with present day issues, right? Wrong. He's full of controversial opinions, immaturity, and I'm fed up his stubbornness and ignorance towards the things he talks about. Now, I'm all for different opinions and having a friendly, respectful, intelligent discussion, but he just isn't on it. I play fortnite with him and sometimes his cousin, his cousin who is super immature, regressive, and uses language that I'm comfortable hearing - for example, his cousin is totally fine using the word fa**ot, the N word, 'slag', so you can see why I don't like him much. My friend tries to impress him and behaves incredibly immaturely with his cousin. Anyway, opinions-wise, and I know not everyone agrees with me but, he doesn't believe in white privilege, he doesn't think we need Pride month, Pride history month, Pride parades, he doesn't believe there is or ever was a patriarchy, he claims to have OCD (and what he's described to me (I'm diagnosed with OCD) doesn't at all sound like OCD) and has HAD IBS (which from my sister, I know you don't just have IBS for a year and then you're fine, it's a forever life long thing); he also doesn't see the difference between sex and gender even after I've explained it to him (and I know not everyone gets it but I explained it very clearly and he wasn't having it), he keeps telling me to just 'be myself' instead of tackle my gender problems. The list goes on. Now, he also works at a special school with kids who have behavioural issues due to ADHD and autism. I've told him that I believe I have ADHD (now diagnosed) and autism. I told him all my experiences and he told me that I don't have either because I don't act like the kids he works with, so I've gone through a lot of doubt about myself. As I mentioned, too, I'm currently having gender issues and I've been trying out he/they pronouns for a while (I'm AFAB). The other day, I reminded him of this and last night I called and played fortnite with him and his cousin... for the ENTIRE call (which was about two hours) he used NO pronouns for me at all. He chose not to refer to me as anything. On the one hand, i wasn't being she/her'd which was good but the fact that he carefully structured each sentence he said so that he wouldn't have to use pronouns for me hurts so much. I felt really invalidated, left out, insignificant, and sad. I couldn't stop thinking about it last night. I understand that not all cishet people will understand it, but considering how close we are, I'd have thought he'd try. I feel like I'm hanging onto him in the hope that he'll change. I've tried so hard but he just isn't getting any of it. Trouble is, he helped me a lot through my depression, so it'd be really hard to part ways with him. Some people would probably say it's petty to let a friend go just because of this, but I feel like if we were high school friends, we'd have parted ways a long time ago because our brains just don't really match up? Most of my friends queer or disabled or neurodiverse in some way so they get me, but me and him are just not on the same wavelength at all. I do have some uni friends who are cishet but they're university students and they tend to be very accepting of diverse people - he didn't go to university he's never experienced diversity aside from me. I'm also really starting to struggle with calling him with his cousin too because, it sounds odd but, they're so neurotypical I don't actually understand them anymore. Last night, I barely spoke, my brain just can't present/mask anymore with them, I couldn't communicate. It was horrible. I really don't know what to do. I know that the best thing to do would be to talk to him, but he gets so awkward and weird about stuff. And I can't seem to get him on a call alone anymore, it's always with his annoying cousin.
  23. Hi, I'm planning on doing a few interviews with people who advocate for the disabled community and I'm going to be getting in contact with some people like the accessibility team at my university to see how, for example, how the university's one way systems for covid were planned out to be as accessible as possible. There's also other studies and literature I'll be using and applying that to my ideas etc. I didn't scratch it much, but it sort of gave me a sense of relief, but at the same time I wasn't happy that I was doing it and having the urge to do it. It sort of helped a bit with all the overwhelming feeling and thoughts I was getting. I think if I were to get it again, I may do one day but, I'd definitely need better ways of coping for sure. Now that people around me have a better idea of how much if effects me mentally, I think that'll help. It's hard because all I want to do when I'm on it is hide but I can't do that forever. I guess I'd have to keep myself occupied and really really look after myself. It's hard to think of things to be honest when you feel so negatively towards something. But definitely self care, super self care, because I really do neglect myself when I'm on it.
  24. Hey @ElijahB Welcome to our community I can totally see why you have no idea what to do, and you're definitely not alone in feeling like you're in a predicament when it comes to this kind of thing. I'm wondering, what have they said and done to show you that they don't agree with homosexuality in the past? I guess I'm asking to get an idea of how strong their views are. Speak soon.
  25. Hey @Dywwik I'm sorry that your anxiety is draining you at the moment. I wonder, is your anxiety always quite intense, or does it come and go? I can totally see how it would be exhausting with the strangers in the hall and having to find a defining feature of everyone. I'm curious to know, how do you feel when you can find that defining feature of someone?
  26. Hey @Cadence How are you feeling? It must be stressful for you while she is being like this. Have you thought about asking her friends if they know what's going on?
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