SpnWinchester Posted February 27, 2019 Share Posted February 27, 2019 I was bullied all through primary and high school now I'm finally at college but things have started all over again. What is wrong with me? My parents tell me that I should 'just get over it' because it's only verbal so it does no damage. They don't understand the pain I go through everyday because of depression. I can't tell them that people have started bullying me again because they will just make me feel so stupid. HELP? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remi Posted February 27, 2019 Share Posted February 27, 2019 Hey SpnWinchester, Welcome to our community, I'm so happy you have found us. Sorry to hear you have experienced bullying in your life. Please know this is not your fault at all! People bully for a multitude of reasons - here are some of them https://www.ditchthelabel.org/why-do-people-bully/ - but know it is not your fault. We don't think you should just 'get over it' and we know that it's just not that easy to. You shouldn't feel stupid for being bullied, you have done nothing wrong. Is there anyone you know who you could talk to? A friend or someone from the college. Have you spoken to a Dr about feeling depressed? They can refer you to counselling which can really help. We're here for you -Remi MultiQuote Quote This Digital Mentor Account is no longer active. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SpnWinchester Posted February 28, 2019 Author Share Posted February 28, 2019 I have no one to talk to. My only good friends when to different places after high school. I've seen a doctor and have been in therapy for over a year but i just keep feeling worse not better. I'm broken no one can fix me. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ditch the Label Staff Blondie Posted February 28, 2019 Ditch the Label Staff Share Posted February 28, 2019 Hey SpnWinchester, It's truly horrible to feel that way but often with therapy or counselling there are times when it's particularly tough as we unpick everything - it brings it all right up to the surface and although it's an important part of healing, there's no doubt that it can be really painful and difficult to deal with as we revisit hurt, upset, trauma etc to process it and move forward. I can really relate to the feeling that you're in pieces and feeling incredibly low... but have found that this is when I've actually made the most progress and it slowly starts to get better as you build up your strength again. It might be worth asking your therapist to almost recap the progress you've made so you can see how far you've come. I know when I did this I was pretty shocked as I'd done so much more than I realised. It's tempting to stop when it's so painful but I would definitely urge you to speak to your therapist so they know you're finding this particularly difficult right now as it may be that they need to slow down a little at this point and unpack things into much smaller sections and a pace that you find easier to deal with. Having these conversations is an important part of the process of recovering and allows you to have more control and power in your long term recovery. You can do this and we're here to help support you too. How does this sound? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SpnWinchester Posted February 28, 2019 Author Share Posted February 28, 2019 I can try to. Everything is just felling really pointless and hopeless right now. I don't think I'm strong enough to get through this. Maybe I'm just too weak? I'm having a really hard time trying to find reason to carry on fighting. I'm tired of feeling like this all the time. I need to escape it. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ditch the Label Staff Blondie Posted February 28, 2019 Ditch the Label Staff Share Posted February 28, 2019 (edited) I hear you and understand that feeling of hopelessness... but you absolutely deserve to get through this and to live your best life. Feeling this way has nothing at all to do with weakness and everything to do with feeling and emotions. When we're feeling so desperate our mind can kinda play tricks on us as it reacts to opening up about hurt and trauma while it processes the change that moving forward brings. It's normal to feel so off balance when you are trying hard to move through something. I know it's hard but try and bring your thinking back from looking at the entire picture of feeling well and over all this stress and bring it down to smaller steps, so getting through this day, this week, this month, from therapy appointment to therapy appointment - whatever works for you. This should make it more manageable rather than feeling like there is a huge climb to do all at once. What is one smaller thing that you'd like to achieve? Edited February 28, 2019 by Blondie MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SpnWinchester Posted February 28, 2019 Author Share Posted February 28, 2019 Finishing mt college assignment that i haven't been able to concentrate on enough to do. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ditch the Label Staff Blondie Posted February 28, 2019 Ditch the Label Staff Share Posted February 28, 2019 Okay great. Try breaking down the steps on that so that you're not looking at the task of the whole assignment. Set yourself manageable goals, like a paragraph a day or finalising the format, the introduction, the summary or conclusion. It might be a good idea to ask for an extension if you haven't already as this will further reduce any pressure. Does your college know that you're going though a rough time? They usually have good student support in place to allow for support and extra time. What are you studying? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SpnWinchester Posted March 1, 2019 Author Share Posted March 1, 2019 I'm studying Level 3 Health and Social Care. Some people at college know but communication in this place is rubbish and they said that they can't do much to help as I'm already getting treatment elsewhere so I just need to get on and get my work done. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remi Posted March 1, 2019 Share Posted March 1, 2019 Hey SpnWinchester, That's a really cool thing to study, shows that you have lots of empathy and want to help people. They may not have any trained counsellors on site which is annoying I know. Who are you seeing already, do you find it's helping. As Blondie said above, try just doing a little bit at a time instead of worrying about the whole big lot. Remember it is only work, don't let it get you down too much. Any fun plans for the weekend? -remi MultiQuote Quote This Digital Mentor Account is no longer active. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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