My last post

[Blc]

Hi

 

This'll be my last post on here, I'll probably be back, but for now, this is my last post I'm hurting to the point where I don't think even you guys or anyone can help me anymore, I'm not cutting, and I'm not in hospital but everything is just really hard rn I can't take it anymore,  thank you all for your support, it really has meant a lot to me I feel like I can actually vent with you guys and I really have needed it because I feel like i want to scream, I love all of you for the advice you have given me, and if I get better I might come back, but for now, this is it for me,. I'm sorry if I disappoint any of your but I just can't take it anymore

 

 

goodbye 

[Jayla]

5 minutes ago, Blc said:

Hi

This'll be my last post on here, I'll probably be back, but for now, this is my last post I'm hurting to the point where I don't think even you guys or anyone can help me anymore, I'm not cutting, and I'm not in hospital but everything is just really hard rn I can't take it anymore,  thank you all for your support, it really has meant a lot to me I feel like I can actually vent with you guys and I really have needed it because I feel like i want to scream, I love all of you for the advice you have given me, and if I get better I might come back, but for now, this is it for me,. I'm sorry if I disappoint any of your but I just can't take it anymore

goodbye 

I understand what you’re going though and taking time for yourself is a good thing. Im glad your not cutting or in the hospital, if you have to scream let it out im here for you no matter what you do, you taking a break from everything doesn’t disappoint me and i love you too and i’ll be here when you get better! im always here for you need me and im here to listen 🫶

[Monsoon]

 

Hey there. We have sent you a message on confidential support to check in. To see this, please click on 'Confidential Support' at the top of the page and reply to us there.  Just incase you need it, here is some safety information if you are in crisis: 

• A list of worldwide crisis lines: https://www.befrienders.org - you can find the one for your country and call them if you are in crisis 
• An app I can recommend: https://www.prevent-suicide.org.uk/find-help-now/stay-alive-app/ this has safety plans to make sure you don't harm yourself and you might find it useful
• Remember, you can always call the emergency services or go to your local emergency department at the hospital for support
• Take care and speak soon. Remember, you are not alone. 

 

 

[Blc]

23 hours ago, Everybody_luv_jae said:

I understand what you’re going though and taking time for yourself is a good thing. Im glad your not cutting or in the hospital, if you have to scream let it out im here for you no matter what you do, you taking a break from everything doesn’t disappoint me and i love you too and i’ll be here when you get better! im always here for you need me and im here to listen 🫶

Thank you i really appreciate that, you're so sweet

[Jayla]

1 hour ago, Blc said:

Thank you i really appreciate that, you're so sweet

Ofc Blc! You’re now my compa (which means friend in spanish) i meant everything i said

[Blc]

On 2/11/2023 at 7:58 PM, Everybody_luv_jae said:

I understand what you’re going though and taking time for yourself is a good thing. Im glad your not cutting or in the hospital, if you have to scream let it out im here for you no matter what you do, you taking a break from everything doesn’t disappoint me and i love you too and i’ll be here when you get better! im always here for you need me and im here to listen 

50 minutes ago, Everybody_luv_jae said:

Ofc Blc! You’re now my compa (which means friend in spanish) i meant everything i said

Aww thank you, I've never heard of the Spanish way of saying friend, that's interesting! I guess you're my compa too! I think I'm going to say that instead of friend from now on, I actually like it lol

 

[Jayla]

21 minutes ago, Blc said:

 

i luv calling my friends (compa) im glad im ur compa too

[Blc]

4 minutes ago, Everybody_luv_jae said:

i luv calling my friends (compa) im glad im ur compa too

Same here, thank you, this has actually cheered me up

[Jayla]

Just now, Blc said:

Same here, thank you, this has actually cheered me up

im so glad it did compa

[Blc]

Thank you, anyway, I need to go, I'll maybe talk to you tomorrow compa

[Jayla]

talk to you tmr maybe compa

[Blc]

Update: She saw the messages from the other day on here  and thinks im cheating on her, which isn't the case, so I left her some messages which she probably won't reply to but yh I left her some messages explaining the situation and telling her that isn't the case because it's not 

 

[Jayla]

9 minutes ago, Blc said:

Update: She saw the messages from the other day on here  and thinks im cheating on her, which isn't the case, so I left her some messages which she probably won't reply to but yh I left her some messages explaining the situation and telling her that isn't the case because it's not 

Compa, im so sorry that is the case and you don’t deserve that. It’s good that you left her messages explaining the situation if she doesn’t answer you can’t say you didn’t try to explain what was really going on. I really hope she understands that you weren’t cheating. 

[Blc]

Hopefully yeah 

 

[Blc]

But she said we're done before I sent those messages so who knows? I hope she does understand tho because I don't plan on cheating on her anytime soon, because we just got back you know? and I actually want to make it work so what would be the point of coming back if I was going to cheat on her? none at all I sent the message the latter half of yesterday and she sent the were done message in the morning, and hasn't replied so idk what to think 

[Jayla]

For one you’re right what’s the point of getting back together if your just gonna cheat on her smh . but none the less you care for her and you love her even if she doesn’t come around you should know you didn’t do anything wrong and if she can’t see that nothing was going on. then maybe she doesn’t love like she says she does cuz if i was her i tried to talk you around it and find out what really happened before ending anything 

[Blc]

True because I'm not, a similar situation happened last year actually, on a different forum, I was talking to her best friend on there, not like that obviously, and she didn't like that I was talking to her best friend without telling her, which, understandable I can understand that, and I had to explain to her that that wasn't the case, because it wasn't. 

 

And yeah your right I love her to pieces, even if she doesn't see that, I do and I'm committed to her, it's difficult cause it's long distance and it's hard to tell if we're with each other and with someone else at the same time. But I've never took advantage of the long distance thing, I had feelings for my best friend for 8 years, and during that year I still liked her, but I didn't do anything because I was with her, she was in hospital during that year as well, but I never took advantage of that either even when during August we didn't talk a lot I stayed because I love her, that is also why I came back, as well as the fact I missed her loads and ending what we had completely destroyed me, as I said i thought I could get over her, but I couldn't, I really love her more than I've ever loved someone in a relationship genuinely and everyday since it ended and even now, I've regretted ending it, not a day goes by where I don't, I told her all of this as well. I keep beating myself up because of ending it and ik I can't change the past, but I really wish I could. 

[Jayla]

51 minutes ago, Blc said:

True because I'm not, a similar situation happened last year actually, on a different forum, I was talking to her best friend on there, not like that obviously, and she didn't like that I was talking to her best friend without telling her, which, understandable I can understand that, and I had to explain to her that that wasn't the case, because it wasn't. 

And yeah your right I love her to pieces, even if she doesn't see that, I do and I'm committed to her, it's difficult cause it's long distance and it's hard to tell if we're with each other and with someone else at the same time. But I've never took advantage of the long distance thing, I had feelings for my best friend for 8 years, and during that year I still liked her, but I didn't do anything because I was with her, she was in hospital during that year as well, but I never took advantage of that either even when during August we didn't talk a lot I stayed because I love her, that is also why I came back, as well as the fact I missed her loads and ending what we had completely destroyed me, as I said i thought I could get over her, but I couldn't, I really love her more than I've ever loved someone in a relationship genuinely and everyday since it ended and even now, I've regretted ending it, not a day goes by where I don't, I told her all of this as well. I keep beating myself up because of ending it and ik I can't change the past, but I really wish I could. 

Compa, i understand everything you said and i can tell by how you talk about her that she could be the love of ur life and when ur that in love with someone it’s hard to get over them even if it’s for good reasons. it seems like she’s still feeling hurt by what happened with you guys recently which anyone would be so i can understand her side of why she’s acting the why she is but that doesn’t mean she can treat you like this ik we only just become compas but im very overprotective of the people i care about and it seems more and more like you and both hurt. Which doesn’t mean you shouldn’t keep trying but you can only try so much and it’s gonna take a toll on you mental and physical which i don’t want for you or her. it’s also understandable that she didn’t want you to talk to her bsf and that she wanted you to ask to talk with her bsf. It doesn’t mean that you weren’t affected by what happened with you guys and the fact that you liked your bsf for 8 yrs and you still stayed loyal to her is a big thing and not a lot of guys can say the did that and it shows how loyal you are to are and what she means to you 

[Blc]

I really hope she knows too because I really do love her, and despite everything that happened between us, it's never changed she did call me ugly, well too ugly, but despite that I still love her and I don't think that's going to change anytime soon 

[Jayla]

7 minutes ago, Blc said:

I really hope she knows too because I really do love her, and despite everything that happened between us, it's never changed she did call me ugly, well too ugly, but despite that I still love her and I don't think that's going to change anytime soon 

ik you love her but what if she doesn’t love you anymore, if someone loves you the weren’t call you names and point out your insecurities

[Jayla]

16 minutes ago, Blc said:

I really hope she knows too because I really do love her, and despite everything that happened between us, it's never changed she did call me ugly, well too ugly, but despite that I still love her and I don't think that's going to change anytime soon 

while ik your feelings havent changed towards her what bout her feelings towards you? can you really since in a relationship where it has the possibility to be toxic or to be in a relationship where you don’t feel good enough for her cuz you made one mistake one time 

[Blc]

Idk, I just don't know anymore 

[Jayla]

compa, ik this is hard and i feel like im not making it any better 

[Blc]

It's not you, it's my fault I feel like shit I shouldn't because I haven't cheated but I really do feel like crap idk what to think anymore, I'll still be as loyal as it takes but idk I just don't know anymore 

[Jayla]

27 minutes ago, Blc said:

It's not you, it's my fault I feel like shit I shouldn't because I haven't cheated but I really do feel like crap idk what to think anymore, I'll still be as loyal as it takes but idk I just don't know anymore 

Ik you havent cheated and she shouldn’t think that you are and not hear you out cuz her choices affect you too