Egg Posted September 30, 2022 Share Posted September 30, 2022 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Other Click this notice to reveal the content. Holy heck. I can hardly believe it's almost been a whole year since I first planned on coming out. It was at a diversity program, and every one in my group knew I was bi. But I choked. I couldn't come out to my parents. Almost a year later, after some questioning, I've realized that I'm pan and trans. I'm really scared of coming out, especially to my dad who is basically the definition of "old white dude in america". I've chosen a new full name, since I was just going to change my last name before, but now it takes me a while to hear my dead name and know that it's me. I think that having my parents except that I'm trans is more important than coming out as pan. My plan is that when my parents ask me what I'm going to Halloween as next year, I'm going to tell them (or comic-con). But as the time comes nearer, I've been slowly getting scareder (if that's a word, but judging by the red underline, I'd say not), and that sinking feeling in my chest. I've stared to have some nightmares that are a bit more realistic than the usual blood and gore stuff that keeps me spooked. When the show The Umbrella Academy was released, they said I could watch it in a few years, and now that it's TV-MA, and I've already lost count of how many R movies I've seen, the only real difference I can tell by googling it is that one of the characters is trans, along with his actor, and now my parents say "a while, there are things you wouldn't understand," and I feel kind of depressed about it and that doesn't really help my anxiety about coming out. At the diversity program, we made little name tags with our pronouns and preferred name on it, and without thinking I wrote "He//It," and I guess my parent's didn't like the 'it' part because they asked me if my trans friends were teaching me about pronouns. I'm sorry if this seemed kinda long, I've just had a lot on my mind lately and needed to get it off of my chest and ask for advice, thank you. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted October 1, 2022 Share Posted October 1, 2022 Hey there, Thank you for opening up to us. No need to apologise for the length, and it's not long. Even if it were, that's no problem, because this is a safe space where you can express yourself however you like, so go for it. From what you've said, it just sounds like you're having anxiety which is totally normal and expected in this kind of situation, and I'd be curious if you did not have that feeling right now. I know you can do this, so try not to listen to those negative thoughts too much and try to tune into the positive side of things a bit more; it is there, you just have to put more of an effort in to listen. What do you think? Just remember, one day, this will all be done! MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 1, 2022 Author Share Posted October 1, 2022 Thank you. I do feel like if I stopped paying attention to my worries I'd probably do better. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted October 1, 2022 Share Posted October 1, 2022 Sending my love MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 2, 2022 Author Share Posted October 2, 2022 Thanks! MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anti-Lvcid Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 can I give u sum advice? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 2, 2022 Author Share Posted October 2, 2022 Yes, ok. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 15 hours ago, Egg said: Thank you. I do feel like if I stopped paying attention to my worries I'd probably do better. Absolutely. It's more about trying to tune into the positive thoughts more, and for those negative thoughts you have that are based in anxiety, try to turn them into positive ones. What do you think? Would you like to try that for a couple of weeks and let us know how it goes? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 2, 2022 Author Share Posted October 2, 2022 I've already started doing it and am still scared, but more confident. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 How are you, egg? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 2, 2022 Author Share Posted October 2, 2022 (edited) Ok, I'm just hoping that the light at the end of this tunnel isn't a train, and if it is, lets hope I've got a ticket! You? Edited October 2, 2022 by Egg MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 You've got this egg, we believe in you. Yes you'll have your ups and downs but with the support and courage you won't be in this dark tunnel for long honestly! I thought that but I'm slowly coming out :) and I know you can too !! I'm okay ty lovely 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 2, 2022 Author Share Posted October 2, 2022 Thanks! MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 Most welcome ☺ ! I'm here foe you even though I just met you :) MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 2, 2022 Author Share Posted October 2, 2022 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 Most welcome, I hope you're day/night goes well because you deserve it ❤ MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 2, 2022 Author Share Posted October 2, 2022 Day. Also a bonus for this day, I'm coming out to another friend today, so yay! 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 Awww congrats! I'm so happy for you!!! That makes me so happy :)! How's your weekend gone? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 2, 2022 Author Share Posted October 2, 2022 Good, but busy. I haven't had time to read, so thankfully I have time now! MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 Aww yay so pleased to hear things have been good. Any plans for the week? Ah this weekend has gone very fast, haha. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 2, 2022 Author Share Posted October 2, 2022 Read, pet the creatures, see if I actually have money for comic-con, sleep. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 Aww what pets? That sounds so lovely, I'm jealous! MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egg Posted October 2, 2022 Author Share Posted October 2, 2022 One indoor cat that likes to go the enclosed garden and sit on the carrot pot, and an outdoor cat that will randomly sit outside my window. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 That's too cute, Awww! That sounds very therapeutic MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted October 2, 2022 Share Posted October 2, 2022 Oof my post is hidden all I said was that it sounds therapeutic MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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