The completely closed closet

[Alpha9th]

1 hour ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

I know you can do this. I think the challenge might be in putting equal importance on all of them, thus finding yourself with more and more responsibilities, when really, these kinds of things can always be put into a hierarchy of importance. Maybe you could go through them with your partner as well as it might be good to have a different perspective. What do you think? 

I think you are right, thanks for the idea. I am going to discuss it with my therapist and my partner. I am not 100% sure that it will help, but I am definitely going to give it a try. 

[Monsoon]

Great! Let us know how it goes. 

[-Leila-]

You can do this!! I believe in you!

[Alpha9th]

11 minutes ago, leilaa said:

You can do this!! I believe in you!

Thank you! :) 

[-Leila-]

Just now, Alpha9th said:

Thank you! :) 

You've believed in me, so I believe you can do this!

[Alpha9th]

On 8/10/2022 at 11:28 PM, Monsoon said:

Great! Let us know how it goes. 

Hey, 

while I'm away from home I discovered something interesting. I started to mark in my schedule activities that I procrastinate. So, there is two things. 

• Preparing for competention tests and exams. It looks like it's pretty travmatic too me because my previous study in medical school was really, really hard. And I often had depression episodes. 
• Going to sleep. I can't do it fast. I easily can lay down to relax and fall asleep when I shouldn't to, but when I lay down to bed for a night sleep it's different. I don't feel anxious or uncomfortable, but can't stop moving and relax my body, even if I try breathing exercises or meditation. 

[Blondie]

22 hours ago, Alpha9th said:

Hey, 

while I'm away from home I discovered something interesting. I started to mark in my schedule activities that I procrastinate. So, there is two things. 

• Preparing for competention tests and exams. It looks like it's pretty travmatic too me because my previous study in medical school was really, really hard. And I often had depression episodes. 
• Going to sleep. I can't do it fast. I easily can lay down to relax and fall asleep when I shouldn't to, but when I lay down to bed for a night sleep it's different. I don't feel anxious or uncomfortable, but can't stop moving and relax my body, even if I try breathing exercises or meditation. 

Hi there, I hope you don't mind me jumping in while Monsoon is on leave? I'm Blondie - one of the other support mentors here.

These sound like really useful discoveries. I can image that after the experience of medical studies that this would leave a sense of stress related to any form of study and will take some work to almost re-train yourself on how you see studying.

I can very much relate to the sleep issue - sometimes I allow myself to fall asleep wherever I am ( say, on the sofa) rather than go to bed as the whole process can almost wake you up again. How long does it take you to fall asleep when you go to bed for the night? 

[Alpha9th]

3 minutes ago, Blondie said:

Hi there, I hope you don't mind me jumping in while Monsoon is on leave? I'm Blondie - one of the other support mentors here.

These sound like really useful discoveries. I can image that after the experience of medical studies that this would leave a sense of stress related to any form of study and will take some work to almost re-train yourself on how you see studying.

I can very much relate to the sleep issue - sometimes I allow myself to fall asleep wherever I am ( say, on the sofa) rather than go to bed as the whole process can almost wake you up again. How long does it take you to fall asleep when you go to bed for the night? 

Hi, Blondie! It's totally fine, thank you for responding :)

I know how to retrain myself, but, the thing is, I can't even track any destructive thoughts. It's kinda like being allergic to this activity. I just feel anxious and a bit sick when I try to prerare. 

About sleeping issue: it's always 30-60 minutes of lying down and metitation before I fall asleep. 

[Blondie]

19 hours ago, Alpha9th said:

Hi, Blondie! It's totally fine, thank you for responding :)

I know how to retrain myself, but, the thing is, I can't even track any destructive thoughts. It's kinda like being allergic to this activity. I just feel anxious and a bit sick when I try to prerare. 

About sleeping issue: it's always 30-60 minutes of lying down and metitation before I fall asleep. 

Hi, we have a simple guide to stress reprogramming here: https://www.ditchthelabel.org/stress-reprogramming/ it's definitely worth checking out to see if this might work for you.

With sleeping, I know that's not ideal as you'd like to fall asleep quicker but that's not too bad - I wonder if trying to adjust it down by 5-10 minutes might be more achievable? 

[Alpha9th]

2 hours ago, Blondie said:

Hi, we have a simple guide to stress reprogramming here: https://www.ditchthelabel.org/stress-reprogramming/ it's definitely worth checking out to see if this might work for you.

With sleeping, I know that's not ideal as you'd like to fall asleep quicker but that's not too bad - I wonder if trying to adjust it down by 5-10 minutes might be more achievable? 

This guide is for identifying source of anxiety and finding ways of eliminating it, but I understand it (there is only one that really sabotage me for now) and 8 know what should be done. I just can't. 

To start with something, why not 5-10 minutes? Yes, it would be good. 

[Monsoon]

Hey,

I'm thinking about the psychological perspective around sleep. When we struggle to fall asleep, we can often find ourselves on a countdown almost, in the sense that we tell ourselves things like 'If I fall asleep now, I will get 8 hours which is enough'. However, when this doesn't happen, we find ourselves getting irritated and counting down the hours more and more. In short, it can be really helpful to take that pressure away and think about how even if you get a little sleep, it's better than none. It can also be really relaxing to tell yourself that you are just going to rest, and if it happens, it happens. What do you think? 

[Alpha9th]

On 8/20/2022 at 8:12 PM, Monsoon said:

Hey,

I'm thinking about the psychological perspective around sleep. When we struggle to fall asleep, we can often find ourselves on a countdown almost, in the sense that we tell ourselves things like 'If I fall asleep now, I will get 8 hours which is enough'. However, when this doesn't happen, we find ourselves getting irritated and counting down the hours more and more. In short, it can be really helpful to take that pressure away and think about how even if you get a little sleep, it's better than none. It can also be really relaxing to tell yourself that you are just going to rest, and if it happens, it happens. What do you think? 

Well, I still struggle with this issue, but now I can have some good restful sleep with my pills. It isn't the best decision, but now I feel much better. 

Anxiety is the thing for me, that's why I have sleeping problems. You now, it is very hard to stop worrying, even if you know that it is irrational. 

[Monsoon]

On 12/26/2022 at 9:57 PM, Alpha9th said:

Well, I still struggle with this issue, but now I can have some good restful sleep with my pills. It isn't the best decision, but now I feel much better. 

Anxiety is the thing for me, that's why I have sleeping problems. You now, it is very hard to stop worrying, even if you know that it is irrational. 

Hey there,

That's good that you have some support and are feeling much better. Also, yeah, being able to turn down the noise that comes with your thoughts is tricky. I'm wondering, can you tell me about a time you were able to calm down when feeling anxious? What helped you?