Jump to content
This topic contains content which has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Abuse, Hate, Death, Suicide, Other

I'm thinking about coming out to my homophobic parents i'm Bi but I don't know what they'll say.


lKail
Message added by Harper,

Please keep this thread to support-based messages.Β 

Recommended Posts

yeah I feel like when parents want you to be straight but ur already Gay, Lesbian, Bi, or Trans.(I know there is much more people could be but this stuff just came to my head) Then there like asking you to change ur skin color, stuff that cannot be changed to a persons liking.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yeah I feel like when parents want you to be straight but ur already Gay, Lesbian, Bi, or Trans. (I know there is much more someone could be just that stuff came to my head first)Then they are like asking you to change ur skin color, something that cannot be changed to a persons liking.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I told my dad, who has said many homophonic things in the past, that I engaged in some homosexual behavior and he took it very well. I think you’ll be surprised by their response. I was. I think if you experience love from your parents regarding other areas of your life, then you’ll experience it here. My dad’s reaction was actually the opposite of what I expected. Instead of being disappointed in me he actually quote β€œfelt terrible” that I burdened myself for so long by not telling him.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think that it really depends on the parents though. Of course, coming out to your parents lifts a lot of weight off your shoulders, but sometimes it may hurt more than it helps. For example, if your parents abuse you in any way, and you feel it isn't safe, I would advise not coming out. Also, unfortunately not all parents accept that this is who their child is. Like mine, for instance. They love me, but they put me in therapy to see if I could be "fixed" of my gender issues. (Spoiler : I couldn't) So really, it depends on the parents, and most people don't have issues with it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yeah it does definitely does lift weight off of ur shoulders just I am really happy that ur dad took it well Grianthedudewithsocialphobia, and dude I wish I could go to a therapy just so I can lift stress off of my shoulders.And I am very sorry that ur parents tried to "fix" you.( Actually they just wanted to change you to their liking which I hate how parents try to deny that their child is their true self).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Digital Mentor
8 hours ago, deoxyr_ said:

I think that it really depends on the parents though. Of course, coming out to your parents lifts a lot of weight off your shoulders, but sometimes it may hurt more than it helps. For example, if your parents abuse you in any way, and you feel it isn't safe, I would advise not coming out. Also, unfortunately not all parents accept that this is who their child is. Like mine, for instance. They love me, but they put me in therapy to see if I could be "fixed" of my gender issues. (Spoiler : I couldn't) So really, it depends on the parents, and most people don't have issues with it.

Hey,

Thanks for sharing this with us. I'm sorry they put you in therapy to 'fix' your gender; I cannot imagine how awful this must have been for you. Can I ask, are you still going to that therapy?Β 

  • Like 2
  • Pride 1

digital-mentor.png.37594766624d87064910e

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 3/7/2022 at 11:16 AM, deoxyr_ said:
On 3/6/2022 at 10:13 PM, XxhelloxX said:

My whole family is also Christian, and yeah I know how u feel about letting ur parents down because I am also Bi and Polyamorous, they only know about the Bi part but ya know the whole "Their all sinners" and the "Its just a phase" yeah. TvT

Yeah thing I some how told my parents that i'm gay and they don't really care they don't support me but they don't care with it turned out better then I expected thankfully.

Β 

Edited by Lonliality
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not anymore, after awhile they stopped forcing me to go. (about a year or so ago) The therapist was a old friend of my parents, and after I came out to them (parents) about being a questioning non-binary person, they scheduled some meetings with him. Overall, it wouldn't have been so bad if what he was saying didn't contradict my personal beliefs. He told me a bunch of things about how most transgender people are really just confused, and think they are trans because of experience(s) they had.Β  In essence, 'trans people are not valid because they were made that way by trauma' For example, he said that I didn't feel like my birth gender because of puberty and parental absence. Most of it was purely psychological, but still, it hurt to hear that from someone my parents trusted.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, deoxyr_ said:

Not anymore, after awhile they stopped forcing me to go. (about a year or so ago) The therapist was a old friend of my parents, and after I came out to them (parents) about being a questioning non-binary person, they scheduled some meetings with him. Overall, it wouldn't have been so bad if what he was saying didn't contradict my personal beliefs. He told me a bunch of things about how most transgender people are really just confused, and think they are trans because of experience(s) they had.Β  In essence, 'trans people are not valid because they were made that way by trauma' For example, he said that I didn't feel like my birth gender because of puberty and parental absence. Most of it was purely psychological, but still, it hurt to hear that from someone my parents trusted.

Nice

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yeah, I think it really depends on the therapist. I would love to go to therapy with someone who supports, and would talk about actualΒ  issues instead of trying to convince me to be cis. For some people, therapy is great. It's a really good place to get let go of anxiety, to talk about your mental state. But it's not for everyone.

  • Pride 1
  • Empowered 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

And I wanted to say that I told my parents that I'm gay they don't really care that much they don't support me but they don't care

Β 

1 minute ago, deoxyr_ said:

Yeah, I think it really depends on the therapist. I would love to go to therapy with someone who supports, and would talk about actualΒ  issues instead of trying to convince me to be cis. For some people, therapy is great. It's a really good place to get let go of anxiety, to talk about your mental state. But it's not for everyone.

I can definitely agreeΒ 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Same I would as well like to a therapy session with someone who supports and just someone I could trust to tell my issues, also I was hanging out with my grandma today (shes like 60) cuz she was lonely in her trailer so I went over and was hanging out with her and I asked what she thought about the whole LGBTQ+ community and she just said she would never be apart of it but said she would never be rude to them.So I tried to give a hint of me being in it but I think I was scared to so I kinda mumbled (talked quietly) and she didn't hear me...I am kinda thankful tho cuz I don't think I fully want to tell my other family members till I actually know for sure what I am.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Also I am glad that ur parents didn't react bad Lonliality, but at the same time I wish that they supported you when u told them that u were gay.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Digital Mentor
17 hours ago, deoxyr_ said:

Not anymore, after awhile they stopped forcing me to go. (about a year or so ago) The therapist was a old friend of my parents, and after I came out to them (parents) about being a questioning non-binary person, they scheduled some meetings with him. Overall, it wouldn't have been so bad if what he was saying didn't contradict my personal beliefs. He told me a bunch of things about how most transgender people are really just confused, and think they are trans because of experience(s) they had.Β  In essence, 'trans people are not valid because they were made that way by trauma' For example, he said that I didn't feel like my birth gender because of puberty and parental absence. Most of it was purely psychological, but still, it hurt to hear that from someone my parents trusted.

Hey there. I've sent you a message to check in. I hope to hear back from you soon.Β 

digital-mentor.png.37594766624d87064910e

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
    Search In
    Find results that contain...
    Find results in...
Γ—
Γ—
  • Create New...