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I M(17) get continuously ridiculed by 2 of my friends


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We met almost 3 years ago through school and from that time the bullying had started. I didn't used to think at the time that it was bullying and as time progressed it only got worse sometimes I would be getting hit on the name of fun this has been happening till today. Now that I have a gf from the same class they have started to message her saying why I am not a good choice for her and that I would leave her anytime soon, however she herself was comfortable enough to share this with me and reassures me that this would not affect anything we have but I am really fed up with this and want to end my friendship with them. At first it felt weird knowing I had been getting bullied since day one and now I just want to keep the good company with me rather than some bullies. POINTER: They did not used to respect my gf before we got into a relationship however she had helped one of him get set-up with a girl however he ruined that chance and now does his best to bring an obstacle in my love life. A couple days ago I even asked this question to which he said quoted ''Do not worry bro It was just for fun' It angered me so much then they took my phone changed my password and decided to read my chats with my significant other luckily those were old chats however after reading her name on my snapchat they sent her a message calling what I call her out of love. ALSO they often blame her for the reason of me getting away from them as I stopped hanging out with them but have not stopped completely yet and they directly send my gf these messages and  not me directly as a result I had been very much filled with anger and disgust. Would appreciate if people with similar experiences drop their suggestions and please do tell me how to cut them off completely as our college is about to start as well.

Edited by nothing12
sorryy needed to specify more
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  • Digital Mentor

Hey @nothing12

Welcome to our community 🙂

It sounds like these friends have really been making your life quite tricky, and it's a shame that they feel the need to do this for whatever reason. I think you are right: it would be good to move away from them and end the friendship. I think that there are two ways to go about this: you could either be pretty open and honest by saying that you don't want to be friends with them anymore, or you could go down the route of doing it gradually, such as responding less to their messages and not spending as much time with them. What do you think would be best for your situation? 

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3 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey @nothing12

Welcome to our community 🙂

It sounds like these friends have really been making your life quite tricky, and it's a shame that they feel the need to do this for whatever reason. I think you are right: it would be good to move away from them and end the friendship. I think that there are two ways to go about this: you could either be pretty open and honest by saying that you don't want to be friends with them anymore, or you could go down the route of doing it gradually, such as responding less to their messages and not spending as much time with them. What do you think would be best for your situation? 

Thankyou for the welcome. Well at this point I was ready to do it openly but then they would again blame my gf for me leaving the friendship so me and her decided to cut them off at the slightest of inconvenience caused by them I already spend less time with them and we rarely talk on messages anymore now what is left is to say goodbye for good. Would love to hear your thoughts on this]

Regards 

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey,

Okay, so yeah, you're thinking of going down the route where you are clear about the end of the friendship. It sounds good that you're already spending less time with them and rarely messaging. If you feel like you need to say goodbye for good and that it would be helpful, then go for it. I would personally message them separately rather than as a group as it can be difficult doing this kind of thing together because people can sometimes gang up in a way. What do you think? 

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Hi,

Well before I didn't even wanted to say a proper goodbye to them,  would it be a good idea to do a formal goodbye in this situation I surely would message separately if I was to do so however I do not know how. Would love to hear your thoughts on it. 

regards.

 

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey,

I think it might be best to just leave it and let it phase out more and more over time. If you are clear and direct about it, there can be conflict as a result, but some people feel the need to do this as it gives them a sense of closure. What do you think would be best? 

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Hi, 

I see and I truly get the point behind it as well at the moment I have been literally doing what you described above and will continue to do so, I certainly am in no need for closure with them. Thankyou for all the advise and help you presented with, I am truly grateful to you and now that I have my mind set towards it will certainly cut them off for good. 

regards,

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