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I am in desperate need of stability


talla
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I am 18. Something is very wrong idk what is happening anymore. I don't know what is real I don't know who I am or what I am supposed to be doing with myself.

I feel paranoid so bad lately that I feel even inanimate objects are alive and are going to kill me or hurt me. I can't walk home at night without feeling like the street lights are whispering or going to get me.

I don't know what to do. I hate myself, I feel like everyone hates me in secret or is out to get me. I wish I could just die but I don't want to leave my sister behind. I'm so overwhelmed I don't know what to do. Nobody in my toxic/abusive family will get me mental help I need and keep pushing me off and I feel like my world is falling apart. I feel so ugly, awful and alone. I don't want to be here I wish someone would just help me not feel so erratic and unstable. I don't want to die but it feels like everyone wants me too. I just want to be stable enough to sit down and relax without all these swarming emotions and invasive thoughts. please any advice helps I just need to read another living beings opinions or support on my situation.

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  • Ditch the Label Staff

Hi Talla, 

Have just sent you a DM, but just letting you know one of our mentors is aware of your post and will respond in the next few minutes. 

Thanks,

Harper 😊

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  • Digital Mentor

Hi @talla Thank you for reaching out - it's really brave to share when you are feeling so low.

Our priority is your safety - can I ask if you have any plans to harm yourself? Are you safe right now?

This number below is for any crisis situations:

It must feel very scary how you are feeling right now but we are here to help you through and we can take it step by step. 

Do you have anyone around you that you do trust with this, whether that's a friend or a doctor or a therapist?

I want to reassure you that we hear what you are saying and understand how overwhelming this is - we just want to ensure your safety.


 

 

 

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I sometimes get paranoid when someone walks past me that they are gonna pull out a knife or something but nothing like that...

I dont have much advice but just know you are loved by lots of people and they would hate to know you feel this way

If there is anyone you feel comfortable with and wont make it, worse TALK TO THEM as it can help massively

Now that I have sent this I will feel bad if this didn't help so please talk to people even just getting it off your shoulders can make it better please I dont want anything to happen to you

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Max

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I may not know you personally but just know that people are here for you and while there are bad people in the world there are also good people and I don’t know if this means anything to you but I am praying for you and hope you find yourself in a better situation 

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