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  1. HAVING TO DEAL WITH MY SEXUALITY AFTER A LONG TIME (sorry about my english, i´m from Brazil) I have had a first trying of coming out when i was 15, i was confused because i was having a crush in one of my best friends at the time and i talked to a friend who i thought i could trust, but he threw me out of any closets i could ever be on for my mom and she find texts that i said to my girl crush that i was confused and i need to go for a little while (at that time i lived in a different city and i used to come to my hometown to visit my dad) and me and mom had this huge fight and she mentioned the texts she had caught and called me crazy and a liar and those kind of stuff, and after that i was even more closed about sexuality (i have never had a boyfriend/girlfriend or even kissed anyone yet, and now i´m 21). after that i thought i was just done with that, and that confusion was just a thing from the age. but i was completely wrong. in 2017 i meet one of my best friends till this day and by 2018 i discover myself having feelings for her as well, but because of the last time i never even said that to anyone (only one friend, who i think didn´t believed me at all) and i never even mentioned that to my mom or any of my others friend. back then i was a total wreck, my emotional health was done, i was about to enter college and dealing with my sexuality at that point was going to be even more painfull. so, i´ve kept this feelings in the locker for at least 5 years, but i didn´t knew that i have had kept those feelings deep inside of me. i think you all know, but this year with 21 years and loving myself more i opened myself for having a romantic relationship (the first one), and at the same time "heartstopper" was out and i saw myself, all of my confusions reflected in Nick and the way he deal with it inspired me to open this "door" (my therapist calls this part of me, the door i´ve opened it) of my own, witch brought to the surface all those feelings i kept for myself regarding my best friend. and after a month and some days i feel at ease talking about those feelings in therapy, but i can´t point out where i would put myself in (under what letters of the lgbt yet) but i´m taking things slowly and following my pace to it. but after these one month coming in touch with myself and thinking about my sexuality and rediscovering those old feelings for my friend i am coming to that time where i want to share to my mom about everything and sit with her and just say it, and i was also thinking in a way i could say to this friend how i feel for her and it´s been a lot in my head and i´ve been dealing with this "alone" (i have my therapist) and i wish i could have someone to talk to you know? this is all mixed up and confused but i feel like sharing it even tho no one responds <3
  2. richthakid

    Intro

    Im richthakid and have been struggling with identity and know I am a him. I am pretty sure I belong in this community. I am from Florida and have parents that love me so much, coming from a religious upbringing I feel unsure about how I can be my authentic true self. I enjoy challenges and discovering my potential as well and i love helping others in any capacity I can. I'm on this website to learn more and educate myself about who i am. Welcome any feedback guys thanks!
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