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Showing results for tags 'nonbinary'.
So I’m really drained right now of dysphoria which really isn’t doing a lot of good for me right now because I want to talk about how I’m feeling but my hands and brain won’t actually let me properly type and this is taking a lot of energy already. So I’m writing in note form, summarising what I’ve been thinking and feeling, especially over the last few days: - Feeling dysphoric because my parents wouldn’t accept me for who I am - Knowing I can’t come out so I have to get misgendered everyday - I use he/she/they pronouns but I hate the repetition and singular use of “she/her” pronouns because it’s my birth pronouns and I’m not a girl - Internalised enbyphobia as I feel invalid because of my parents’ beliefs, leading me to feel ashamed because I’m also internally and unintentionally invalidating other nonbinary people at times in the process - Denial. Surely I can’t be nonbinary? Where has this all come from as I was fine identifying as a girl before? I know this is dumb because the dysphoria and euphoria I feel is very much real. I’m not comfortable being a girl - Scared of what other people’s views on nonbinary people will be when I go to my new environment (college). What if the friendship group I get into doesn’t accept me when I come out? - Feeling wrong for using a new name before coming out as nonbinary. Also, what happens when I’m out in the street with parents and I could potentially bump into one of them and they address me by that name? Do I play it off as a nickname/joke name/inside joke between the group? - Haha, I also have to tell my tutor for my course about my new name which will mean I’ll have to come out to them immediately, as my birthname will probably be on the system, just so the other people on my course don’t get confused and I have to out myself to them. I’ve thought about writing it in a note, and I think I’ll go with that, as it won’t cause as much anxiety as me forcing myself to actually tell them face to face and ending up not doing it because it’s too anxiety-inducing. - What if everything at college goes downhill and I end up not telling people my name so I have to get deadnamed? So yeah, I’m glad I did put it all in note form because, as it turns out, there’s a lot. Also I’m less drained right now after getting it all out which is good.
Hey, I’m Asher and I’m nonbinary and pansexual. It’s been a little less than a year since I figured out who I am, and this whole process has been really crazy. At first I didn’t think I had gender dysphoria, but now I’m starting to realize that it’s always been there. Ive always been self conscious about appearing too feminine since I’m AFAB, but before I thought it was because I was a tomboy. Now I’m starting to realize that it’s not exactly normal for a cis girl to daydream about her voice being deeper or being mistaken for a guy. Now, when I look in the mirror I have mixed feelings about what I see. I think I look cute, but I wish I looked more androgynous. What I really want is to get a binder. I know that would help a LOT, but I won’t be able to get one for another couple of years, maybe longer. My parents don’t know that I’m nonbinary yet, so I can’t really ask them for one. I also want to be able to shop in the men’s section as well as the women’s section so I can add more masculine clothes to my closet, but I’m too scared to ask for that too. I’m not sure what I can do to help with my dysphoria. I can’t really do anything until I come out, but I’ve already made plans to do that in around a year and a half. So what do I do until then? Do I just power through it?