Search the Community
Showing results for tags 'advice'.
Found 19 results
-
There is this one female classmate of mine I want to be friends with but I don't really know how since we don't talk much with each other, though whenever we did talk with each other it always ended pretty well. We seem to be similar personality wise and she has her birthday one day before me. I'm kind of an awkward person irl, so most of the time communicating with me ends in awkward silence. I try to socialize but I always end up failing which is why I don't have that many friends unless they make the first move and start a good conversation lol... Anyway, she has always been really nice and just a great person to be around which is why I want to get to know her better, I just really don't know how. She is quite popular at our school, the most popular girl in our class and also very smart, always getting straight A's and stuff and I'm kind of that kid that does fit in but is definitely more an outsider lmao, I do get good grades but no straight A's. I just think it would be awkward for me to approach her at school cause, it's not something that I usually do (she also always hangs around with all my other classmates and I'm chilling with my friends most of the time) and it's just going to be veryyyyy awkward, sure I know all my classmates but I barely talk to any of them and I also don't want it to seem like I only want to get to know her because she always gets good grades and is popular which is really not what I am going for here. Plus, my fellow pals at school going to be confused too. I honestly just want some more friends that I can talk with while feeling comfortable enough to be myself around them ig. Idk if this is weird to ask but how do you ask to be someone's friend irl lmao, how should I approach this? Man, I want my kindergarten self back sheesh, this is so complicated. Thanks for reading tho! I hope you'll have a very nice week! I appreciate any advice that comes my way lol. Thank you! -
asexual i am asexual and my boyfriend is not
damian posted a topic in Sexuality, Dating & Relationships
This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Sex -
Hello, and thank you if you decide to read all of this, and if you respond to me. Since March/April I was good friends with a boy, I slowly became very close with him, to the point where people thought we were dating when we weren't, but oh well. School was actually fun, I had been bullied a few times that same year by the same people, but I wasn't since I was friends with him. We would always talk, go to after school clubs together, sit next to eachother in lessons etc. We spent everyday with eachother, now looking back it makes me upset since I'll never have that memory with him ever again. Like most schools in the UK, we had 6-7 weeks off school for our summer holidays. Over that amount of time, we weren't as close anymore since we never really hung out after school, but we would text. We spoke about it eventually and said 'maybe at school we will be closer again, the more we talk and see eachother' So we agreed on that and texted like normal. That was whilst I was on holiday too, but once I got back, this happened I added him to a groupchat with other people from our school, he wasn't that bothered. But he gets annoyed easily and its kinda funny, keep in mind I have done this one time before with my friend, and hes always chill once we stop. So, me and my friend joke around with calling him gay and saying he goes by 'it/its' its only funny because hes fine after its over, but mean during it. As usual, he ends up leaving the groupchat, but he told one of MINE and HIS friends to leave too, not just that but also block me. And what happened that same day? We were texting and he said 'You have changed a lot' (He messaged me elsewhere since I blocked him after that) He said he meant the way I act, but I dont like it when people talk about my personality or my looks (and more). After a bit of texting about that, I said 'No, thats just mean' and he said 'Please' 'Yk what fuck it i dont wanna be your friend anymore, youre so mean to me' We carried on texting and he said 'You take it too far sometimes' Wanna know what he meant? Me calling him gay. He also kept apolagising right after he said that, and a day later (this happened twice) he kept asking to be my friend again, and apolagising. I never forgave him and I still won't, considering what has happened since we have started going back to school Please give me advice for now, and I will give an update on what happened last week, the week before and what WILL happen this week -
This summer (3-4 months ago) I had a girlfriend. I thought things were going well. It was my first relationship so I didn't really know what "normal" was. I quickly found out that being in the bathroom kissing someone who wouldn't tell me their name was NOT a relationship. Whenever I asked her what her name was or if we could go somewhere else outside of the bathroom she would say no or pull my hair (it quickly escalated). I was left feeling confused always thinking what did I do wrong, even though It wasn't me. When I found that out I didn't even break up I just ran. It's been four months later, and I Think I might have a thing for someone, let's call them olive. I think that they like me back,and i just started realizing it, I am pretty blind sometimes. For EX. recently they asked if I wanted to listen to music through earphones w/ them which they never really ask anyone else to do. I just don't know if it will be like the last time. if you have advice please give it to me! thx
-
okay so i know i'm asexual. and i'm pretty sure i'm aro. but there's this friend i had and whenever i was around them id get butterflies and id want to hold their hand. apparently this is a sign of romantic attraction, but isnt necessarily. anyway i was completely repulsed to the idea of dating them (mostly) and anything romantic repulses me A LOT. like kissing, cuddling, touching- all of that repulses me. and i can't figure out the difference between romantic and platonic attraction. i think im quoiromantic?? idk- i feel broken like i'm missing out on romantic attraction, and society puts so much emphasis on sex. kids are already talking about dating and stuff, and for me it's all something i can't relate to. and i think i've experienced alterous attraction, platonic attraction, and aesthetic attraction. sensual attraction seems to also blur lines with romantic attraction for me. it all makes no sense- someone help. i feel like i might want a queerplatonic relationship at some point in my life but im not ready for that yet. yeah someone help i'm identity crisising all over the place one sentence to describe my current orientation: "why have a gf/bf/enbyfriend when you can have garlic bread"
-
Lately I’ve been doubting my sexuality. I kind of find girls very attractive and not so much guys to be honest. But obviously there’s a few things about Guys that I find attractive. I’ve dated a guy before. And I’ve never dated a girl before. To be honest I’ve never even kissed a girl before. But I still have these feelings which are kind of confusing to be honest. Part of me is hoping these confusing feeling will go away. But another part of me feels like it might not go away anytime soon. And I’m not sure what to do now. I don’t know anyone who’s gay or lesbian or anyone from the lgbtq+ community that I can ask for advice. And I don’t want to just kiss a girl just for the sake of kissing a girl. If I one day i do kiss a girl I would want to like her and hopefully she would like me back before that kiss to occur. Guess what I’m wondering is how do you know for sure if you are bisexual?
-
So, I'm biologically a male, and identify as a male. And recently I started dating someone that is biologically a female, and identifies as non binary. I want to tell my parents but my mom has opinions that are not in favor, for example she thinks that if you don't identify as what you were born as you're confused, and she complains about all this lgbtq stuff and says it's "out of hand" and stuff like that. I am a Christian myself and I had asked my pastor about it and he said it's okay. In short, his opinion is it doesn't matter as long as biologically it's different, that is if you're doing sexual activity. So basically I'm asking for advice on how I should tell my parents, or if I should wait a little while, just anything really. Oh yeah, I'm 16 and my partner is 15.
-
This is going to be a pretty long one so here I go. About a year ago, I met this dude on Discord, he was pretty chill but also a bit strange, that didn't really bother me though. Everything was going pretty well at the start, nice friendship and all until well, I had some pretty huge family crisis going on (that is already resolved) and definitely wasn't in the most well state when texting this guy like two months in. I definitely over shared and ended up asking this guy for help. He was really helpful and even ended up getting his family somewhat involved in it which was very respectable, I was really grateful for that. The thing was, he talked about me a whole lot about others even before the crisis happened, which made me pretty uncomfortable, I know about this cause he would tell me. The worst case was though and that was the 2nd most recent thing that happened (before I told him about the family crisis kinda) when he told like his best friend about me and then his best friend called me a bitch and that the dude who texted me shouldn't be involved with me etc just in general pretty negative shit. I get that best friend's reasoning because I am indeed a stranger still and you shouldn't trust people on the internet, at the same time though, no need to insult me like that man. How I know this you ask? Well, my guy somehow thought it was a good idea to tell me all about it. I was pretty offended and confused and this just really left a bitter taste in my mouth after that, for some reason he was the one offended which also kinda confused me, I did talk it out with him and he somewhat apologized and we just continued talking because I didn't have anyone else to talk with during that time. Perhaps, I sound like I was overreacting which I apologize for if that is the case. I just never had anyone openly tell me that they talked about me with other people especially not when it was more trash talk than positive talk. After that family crisis got resolved I really realized how it wasn't that much of a big deal I made it out to be and I felt like the biggest idiot and it was just too embarrassing for me to accept that I was so dramatic about it. I also regretted that I told him so much about this and even more things that I haven't told anyone not even my closest friends and also knowing that my guy talks a lot about me I should've really thought about what I said, I really wasn't thinking straight when texting this dude and regretted it so much. So then I really thought to myself "what should I do? Can I even continue the friendship with this guy, knowing that every single person in his life probably knows me and my face?" My dumbass send him a selfie too yup. I really didn't know what to do so I just talked less and less with him until I eventually just didn't respond anymore and I ended up blocking him on everything. Now one year later, I really realized just how dumb and immature that was and I am genuinely ashamed that it took me a whole damn year to figure that out and now I want to apologize. What I'll be saying next might sound real dumb just please bear with me. I don't want to continue the friendship with him after I apologize. I want to apologize because I used such an asshole way of ending the friendship. One of the main reasons why I ghosted him was to end the friendship in the "friendliest way" I knew which was really stupid and naive of me to think and I did get ghosted from a different person a while after so joke's on my dumbass. Getting ghosted sucks and it really just embarrasses me that I would use such a coward method on someone I have considered a friend. It was just really rude and selfish of me. I want to make things right. I just don't know how to approach this, he might've blocked me too for all I know. I haven't really gotten the courage to text him after a whole year has passed. I would really like some advice on this and how to approach this situation after such a long time has passed. Thank you so much for reading this really long text and I hope you have a nice day!
-
I don't really know where to start, I feel like there is so much worth mentioning and so many straws that broke the camel's back so to speak, but for a long time I knew I NEEDED to get away from my hometown. Now as a 21 year old male, I should be able to, but i feel stuck. Lets start with school... I did bad in in. To make sure you understand the school system in my particular area, classes where essentially divided into three groups. Basic, for the dumb dumbs like me, Academic, for the average student, and advanced, for the students with advanced intelligence. As I implied, I did bad and had to go into basic classes, pretty much baring me from having any chance at most university courses without having to take adult basic education or something after. This has always been something that caused a problem in me, I love science, but I'm probably too dumb to have any chance at doing anything with it, and is one of the big limiting factors that kept me here as long as I have been. So lets move onto reasons why I want to leave. 1 My parents. While far from the worst parents, they are also far from great, they are very controlling, always seeming to try and pick what i should do for me. For example, when i was looking for used machines, twice they pressured me into trying for new ones when i cant afford it, succeeding once.... They make fun of me for everything, even something serious, I've heard them telling their friends all about the time i was constipated as a kid and making a huge joke about it and so many other things... And in general they are assholes, they threatened to kick my brother out because he got mad at one of their friends for hitting a dog. They threatened to kick me out because I said "if there wasn't a literal housing crisis I'd be looking to stay elsewhere" So in general, I feel like I HAVE to do what THEY want because I still live with them and if they aren't happy with something I do, I could be kicked out... Small town life is bittersweet at BEST. Sure, I have easy access to the woods should I want to go on ATV or Snowmobile, but living in a town with a grand total of 300 people things can be rather limited. Not much fresh or cheap food, nothing to really do, and very few jobs (more about that later). And of course, people in small towns Suck, as a person that's the third letter in LGBTQ+, i don't feel like i can be myself. Work is few and far between. This is actually the most recent problem for me too. So after getting laid off from my previous job, I spent nearly a full year jobless, unable to find a new job. I was right about to run out of EI time when a position became available at a store that was just about to open. Of course, I jumped on the opportunity and eventually became the one and only produce person. I found the work quite enjoyable, but lately, my boss has been adding more and ore on to what she wants me to do and its just not possible for me to do it all. Hell, I often couldn't do everything I needed to before she started adding stuff for me to do. I do orders, prebooks, handle the produce delivery, bring everything upstairs, make all the trays, clean, do inventory, and more. Lately my boss has been adding things that she wants me to order, these things include things that belong in deli and when added to my order gets deleted because they aren't supposed to be included in my order, as such, I never get them. And she BLAMES ME for it. She has been trying to get me to bag up bulk items like hard bread, candy, etc. These items don't go in under produce sales, as such, i see no reason why I should have to handle them, not that I usually have time to anyways. And she says the stupidest things, if I was to accidentally or unexpectedly run out of something, for example if all the mushrooms went bad and i had to toss them all out, she would come to me and say "we ran out of mushrooms, you gotta triple the order" which i already did, its why I have so many they are going bad before I even can put them out just so I can say I'm doing what she told me to. If something was shorted an item, she tells me "we ran out, you gotta triple the order" no, we didn't run out, we have been shorted this item 4 weeks running, even if i ordered 100 I'd get 0. And she always blames me, lately she has been messing around with the prices, originally she was happy with anything over a 25% markup, lately shes bumped that up to 40%+. With rising prices in general, this has lead to almost exclusively the sale items selling, but thats besides the point, she removed some of the old tags, left some of the old tags, replaced some of the old tags and than proceeded to tell me off for about 5 minutes that I cant have wrong price tags or items with no price on it at all. As well as constantly reorganizing my produce shelves without me, resulting in me not having space for some things or not knowing where something is. Lately my bosses antics have causes me a lot of stress, I've been going into work with such a bad stomach from the stress that I had to stop and poke around to see if my appendix was exploding or something. I feel stomach sick as soon as I get to work. I get canker sores from stress and my mouth is full of them. I feel like I can't breath. I feel like I'm losing my mind! So, i snapped. I can't stay here anymore, it's not worth it... There is no work around here, Hardly even anything in my province to be honest. I feel like I need to get far away. I considered everything... I found a college course I liked, but being the end of July, it was full and I couldn't join... I can't find any jobs of interest within 100 KM or even in my province, yet I see lots of jobs in other near by provinces, and lots that I'd be really interested in. I feel like I'm trapped... Between needing to please my parents, Missing my chance at school three times, a lack of near by work, and of course lack of money, I feel stuck in an awful situation with no hope of getting out... I just don't know what to do anymore... I NEED to get away, but I feel thoroughly stuck.
-
Well let's start saying that I have this irrational (I would say) fear of doing things alone/by myself, I see people my age going alone to whatever place, using the public transport, etc. But for me this "simple" and "ordinary" activities are quite stressful, I suddenly feel under a spotlight and awkward and start thinking about scenarios that haven't and probably won't occur like getting lost (I have a phone and apps like-) or falling or tripping in the subway stairs and even if they happen i know it wont be the end of the world. It's kind of hard to go out by myself. This next next week I'll start the Uni and will have to go alone and ill be with people that I don't know and I'll start living alone in the city, there are lots of changes and things out of my comfort zone. I'm excited but afraid but excited lol. Any tips? Advice? Encouraging words?
-
So, I may have developed feelings for one of my close girl friends and I have no idea what to do. I mean I do want to tell her but I have this fear of rejection so bad, it’s holding me back. And when I think about telling her, we’re always hanging out . I don’t wanna say it in person even though that’s much more better, but I feel like I’d physically throw up everywhere lol and if she did reject me in person, yknow how awkward that would be trying to brush that over. Annnnd I’m scared if I do confess, she’ll look at me weird and slowly try to break off the friendship. I don’t want anything to be uncomfortable or make it seem like I’m a creep.. cuz I did like her once before. Almost 2 years ago. But she did reject me then because some personal stuff she had and she said she didn’t wanna hurt me. There was this one time where she did confess up to me saying she wanted to kiss me once lol but never did cuz she thought that I’d be weirded out. When actually, at that time I liked her . But now idk, I don’t even think she’d be open to the idea… cuz after that little incident I asked her if she did like me and she said “i don’t think I ever would, you’re like my sister” so… haha.. yeah. I also forgot to mention we’re both lgbtq so . But yes this is my depressing ass story .
-
I’ve been thinking about my sexuality and have come to the conclusion that even if I don’t know my sexuality yet, I’m not 100% straight. Even so, I feel that I would like to tell my parents. I think they would be fine with it, but I have no idea how I would tell them. Does anyone have any advice or tips? Any would be appreciated ^^ -
Im omnisexual with a preference for guys. But everyone is just like,"so ur straight?" when i say no.. ill date anygender but i prefer dudes they'll get mad. I just need some advice plz..
-
confused My friends think I'm not straight
elsiejoy posted a topic in Sexuality, Dating & Relationships
Ever since I met my current friend group in September they have dropped hints that they thought I was bisexual, or queer in general. I always vehemently denied their assertions and it frankly made me angry that they felt they knew me better than I know myself. Then, on Saturday night I got drunk with this friend group and I started flirting with girls at a club which was unusual for me. Normally I would be more interested in flirting with guys but I had just gotten out of a situationship with a guy and I really didn't want to talk to any more men. It felt right to flirt with girls, mind you I was drunk, but at the same time I was embarrassed that I wanted to do it at all. The other thing is that since arriving at university I haven't enjoyed any sexual experiences I've had with men. I thought it was normal to dislike things like kissing until I opened up to my friends and they told me they like kissing even with boys they don't find to be extremely attractive. That definitely got me thinking about my sexuality and whether its more complicated than I initially anticipated. I'm not really sure where to go from here. I definitely want to take a break from talking to men but I also don't know how to figure everything else out. My friends are super supportive but I'm just not there yet, I still feel so overwhelmed. -
I met a person. They're great, we've been together 2 months. Recently, a crush from college messaged me to get through some emotional stuff, so I said yeah. I realised I hadn't moved on at all from them. And they admitted they liked me too. For this person I'd do a lot at the drop of a hat. However, I'm in a committed relationship that I don't want to end out of the blue like that because there's nothing wrong at all and I love the person I'm with. But I also want to be with this crush I have the same amount if not moreso. What do I do cause my heads spinning and I can't choose
-
hope everyone's day is going okay xoxo
-
A close friend began acting distant, if not resentful, towards me, a few months ago. An insult, eye rolls, the silent treatment ensued, and I kept my distance for a few weeks for things to mellow. Just as we begin to act somewhat normal again—texting, joking—she asks for my help: she needs an invitation embedded into an email (aka, composing an email, and dragging the image into the body). The invitation was for a party I AM NOT invited to, that she is hosting! She profusely thanked me for my help (though I’m sure anyone else with basic computer skills could have assisted with the task, like her husband!), and didn’t say another word. It’s too psychopathic for me to understand intentionally hurting someone—especially a FRIEND—so maliciously. I did not give her any reaction, because I believe she was provoking, but she does know I’m mad as hell based on my ignoring her (unlike me) & body language a few days later. She cowered away. Is a “friend” like her even deserving of my piece of mind? Or a discussion? It feels so toxic!
-
It is really scary but its because it is unpredicable it can be bad or good but dont worry about the bad things just take into consideration that not everyone is good /will except you right away but that is just what happens please let me know if you want any updates on this and remember that not everyone is good,Bye -
Hiii so I recently started to question my sexuality and I need some advice because im low key kinda panicking and idk what to do . I love the lgbtq+ community and have many friends within it , im just stressing because idk what to do that’s all I’m in a happy relationship with a boy so the option of experimenting with other genders isn’t really possible rn obviously. But I find both boys and girls attractive and Ik I’d 100% experiment with girls at the very least . My parents are incredibly homophobic so I’d never come out to them tho . But I have amazing friends who would support me . What should I doooo please someone help x
