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dewberry and stars

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Everything posted by dewberry and stars

  1. thanks for the guides and advice, miss! I'll be sure to try them. ^^
  2. I haven't really been doing anythin\ng to help myself lately. I just thought that I was overthinking and that it'd pass by after some time. It's also ok for me to push my sexuality down and hide it, if that's what being a Catholic is supposed to do. I value my religion way more than anything else in the world, but I do know that not everyone thinks this way. I want to thank you for replying to me and trying to help me get better. I'm 14 and I wouldn't say that I'm mature, but I have faced a lot of things so I'd say that I can handle things pretty well. I'd actually appreciate some tips for coping? If that's ok.
  3. it's actually a code on the app's algorithim. so if you've noticed, the one thing that famous tiktokers have in common is the way their face fits in with the standard beauty that the tiktok coders have put onto the programs. so, i'm not saying that it's impossible for people who don't fit in that to become as famous, only that it'll be much harder, siply because of their physical appearance. this is one thing i don't like about the app. people should be recognized by their talents, not just their faces, (charli is a good dancer, bella is a good singer) but some are kinda just, copycats, like they're just like the others and only differ in appearance.
  4. hey, dan! i also feel this way, I see a lot of really toxic things on there. Although some content are fun and entertaining, some trends there have started to become unhealthy. Those that go about body images, weight, beauty, those really make people feel bad about themselves. And there're also a lot who are racist, homophobic, and toxic to religious people. It's mostly seen on the comments section, and I really hate it too. Why can't they just leave these people alone? They're just trying to express themselves and be happy. Some people use TikTok as an escape from whatever issues they have in real life. You know, like they say, if you have nothing nice to say, then don't say anything at all.
  5. hey anna. I don't know how to console you or what to say to you, but I want you to know that I feel the same. I read some of your other comments and I do that too. I'm still getting over my self - harming habits, but I know what you mean. It's like, seeing the blood gives me a kind of satisfaction. Not in a masochist type of way, but kind of like, it made me feel like the pain I was getting was what I deserved. And the fidgeting was kind of just there (My psychiatrist told me I might have ADHD, but we never got into that discussion because of the pandemic), but it did help me relieve stress. I know what it feels like to be depressed and so overwhelmed by everything, that every little thing is getting to you. I hope you're ok or at least getting better. Please come to me or someone you trust if you need help. I'll be here ^^
  6. I've actually always wanted to be part of my school choir, so I tried to audition. It was pretty ok with me since there was only one person in the room and he was a teacher I was familiar with. I also kept getting discouraged because I tried out for 3 times in a row, (auditions are once a year) and I got rejected. So, on my last year, I heard that the choir manager changed and I wanted to try again. To be honest, I almost didn't because I didn't want to embarass myself again. Surprisingly, I got in and we've won competitions bigger than any that the previous choir manager had. The new choir manager was also very strict and it contributed a lot to my low self - esteem and depression now, but she's also the reason why I'm a much better singer now.
  7. hey luna, I'm also near your age (older) and I feel the same. A good way for me to confirm is to think about whether I'd like to be in a relationship with a girl, if I'd do the same things with girls as I do with boys. When I think about that, it gets to me and I would, if not for my religion (bc my religion us against it, but let's not get into that). Another is to think if you would kiss a girl and feel all giddy, like you would with boys. I hope this helps you! ^^
  8. hey di, (sorry, idk how to address you so i just went with di if thats ok) i'm also in the closet and i wanted to give a few suggestions on how to come out, because these ideas really appeal to me ^^ 1. memes - they make it a lighthearted situation, and it's also a fast way of saying it (cons: they might not take you seriously and just take it as a joke) 2. start with someone you're close to - i plan on coming out to my cousin very soon, because i'm most comfortable with her. make sure to pick someone who you're at least 70% sure will support and love you no matter what, even after you come out 3. planning - plan what you're going to say, wait for the right moment, y'know, the important things take time these are only my thoughts and i'm sure there are other ways of doing it. i hope this helps you!
  9. I don't have a fear of public speaking, but I do get nervous before doing it (or on public performances). I overcame it because I would always get stuck with incompetent groupmates and I'd always be the one to present the work. I also got used to it because I was part of the school choir and we performed often. I'm not really sure how to help you, but I found that speaking up in group discussions and being more active there helped me a lot. It gave me a lot of confidence, and that's where I really learned (I always knew, but never really thought about it) that it's ok to make mistakes. Because it was that way that people recognized me as someone who was active and they were genuinely ok when I messed up because they knew I tried my best. I hope that helped you! ^^ Btw, I'm afraid of closely packed circles (trypophobia) and of butterflies.
  10. Hey elise! Pronouns are a way for people to address you. Usually, although not always, females go by she / her, males go by he / him, and non - binary people go with they / them. Of course, people who identify as female or male can still usewhatever pronouns they want. It kind of gives you a sense of identity (this is how I feel about it) because it helps you affirm what gender you identify as. For example, I have a non - binary friend called Amy, and she prefers to be referred with they / them pronouns. I also have another friend, Mark, who prefers they / them but is fine with he / him. In conclusion, the pronouns that people use to address you depend on how you want to be addressed. If you tell them that you'd like to be referred with she / her, then they will. If you'd like they / them, then they will. I hope this helps! ^^
  11. Actually, my parents told me that if I ever turn out to be gay / bi, they'd still love me, no changes or anything. I just feel like I'm betraying my religion and that it's offensive to the LGBT+ community, because I am against same - sex marriage (catholic views) and am bisexual. I recently came out to my friends and they were supportive of me but something changed in our relationship and I couldn't put my finger on it. I then asked them how they felt about me being a devout Catholic and a bisexual person, and they all said that it was hypocritical and offensive (they are also part of the community). So, I've been thinking of just pushing everything down, keeping everything to myself, and just identify as straight, like everyone probably wants me to be. I find my happiness in my religion, so it's kinda ok with me. It's just, I've been a bad place lately and nothing is making it better. Sorry for the late reply, by the way. And thanks for replying to me!
  12. Yes!! There are 3 types, and people just always say it's either straight or gay. Bruv, I literally just said I'm BISEXUAL. BI - "both", smh. 1. Bi but swings more to the opposite sex 2. Bi but swings more to the same sex 3. Bi and likes both equally
  13. hey!! i'm bi myself, and although I've never personally heard these comments before, I can only imagine the anger you felt. Bi - erasure is a real problem and it makes bi people feel like their feelings are invalidated. I hate when people, especially straight, act like they know bisexuality better. Like, bruh??? You're not alone on feeling this way.
  14. hello, I also think they may be wary of you on facebook and social media since they're not familiar with you and don't know you, since you did mention that you just met in college and anime convention. I understand that you're an extrovert and that it may be difficult to sit still when no one is chatting with you, but I think it would be good to consider that not everyone is blocking you because they don't like you. Maybe on your side, you're reaching out to them and trying to be nice and friendly, but on theirs, it may be creepy or annoying. This is my personal take on it since I have felt this way before when extroverted people tried to talk to me. I hope this is not insulting or offensive in any way.
  15. hey chairgrey, in my experience, it was hard to move on. The bullying was a traumatic experience and it really took a hit on to my self - esteem. I'm not sure if this would work for you, but for me, I talked about it to my friends and found someone who appreciated me for who I am. I've never had a boyfriend, but my situation was similar to yours in the sense that someone I loved (my best friend) was with someone who didn't like me, and made the same remarks to me. So when my best friend started ignoring me and hanging out with the other girl, I felt miserable. But when I went into a new school, I got into a group of friends who genuinely liked everything about me. It was a hard process, but because they made me feel like I was enough for them, the feeling of misery I would have when they talk about their other close friends slowly disappeared. I hope this helps. I'm here if you need anything, stay safe!
  16. hey mica, the way your dad is treating you is not normal. It is abusive and disgusting and you do not deserve to be treated this way. But, how you feel towards this, being overwhelmed, depressed, anxious, and everything, is normal. Please don't think that you're overreacting, because you're not. I also have panic episodes and they're not because of a problem as big as yours. I know it's hard, but please hold on. Go on video chats with your friends, or do anything to distract yourself from the harsh world in your house. I'm also here if you need to talk about anything, here or discord is fine, just ask me. Also, you're not betraying you're parents for going on here and talking about this. Because if anything, it's giving other people the chance to help you. I don't know how painful it is but please hold on and stay. I'm here if you need me, ok?
  17. hey trinity, I don't know what to say to you, nor do I think it will actually help you. I don't know what it's like to be physically or verbally abused, but I know it's never good and that it takes a long time for you to recover from it. I just wanted to say that no matter how hard it is, please hold on. We don't know each other, but I know what it feels like to be down in the depths and so overwhelmed. Please remember that I'm here for you if you ever need someone to talk to. You can chat me on discord, if you want! But please, hold on and stay strong. You're probably tired of hearing these words and they are probably cringey to you by now, but I mean it. Talk to me if you need someone, ok?
  18. Hey, I first want to say that I'm sorry that you had to hear those comments. I always, always see those types of comments on youtube and tiktok and it's never funny for me. I totally agree with you, it's not funny to make jokes about the big parts of a controversial topic like religion, racism, and homophobia. I understand that a lot of people go through religious trauma and deal with it through humor, but I hate that they make inappropriate jokes about Jesus and Mary. They say that it's their way of coping with it, but there are much better and aceeptable ways to do it. And with racism and homophobia, those terms shouldn't even exist. Because not hating on someone for their gender, identity, or race should be common sense. And like with religion, it's totally not ok to joke about these. There are people who say things like "I'm a Christian and I laughed sooo hard at this" or "I'm gay and this sent me flying lmao". It makes me mad because those people are not the embodiment of the whole community, their opinion does not make the inappropriate jokes ok. They are terrible and should never even be uttered. Sorry this turned into a rant, lmao. But I hope you know that you're not the only one who feels this way. :))
  19. I am a very religious person. And, as a lot of you probably know, homosexuality is against our beliefs. I have nothing against other gays, but I differ with them on a lot of opinions and beliefs. However, I feel bad because I'm a devout Catholic but a closet bisexual. I feel like I don't belong anywhere because homosexuality is against our beliefs and a lot of people from the LGBTQ+ don't like Catholics. I feel like other gays would not like me because I am both a Catholic and a bisexual person. My parents, who are also devout Catholics and are strongly against gays, told me that even if there were a chance that I were lesbian or bisexual, they would still love me as I am, but I'm still afraid to come out to them. Any words of wisdom?
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