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Blondie

Digital Mentor
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Everything posted by Blondie

  1. I hate when this happens! You start pretending you're completely fine even if you've actually hurt yourself
  2. Hi Holly! If you could go back and change anything from your own personal experience of being on TV - what would you change and why?
  3. Hi @Pirate24 I'm just checking back in with you to see how you're doing?
  4. Blondie

    Sad girl

    It might be time to speak to someone at school about this, especially as it's being going on for so long now - how comfortable are you in doing this? There could be things going on for her that you're unaware of and she might get some help this way. What do you think?
  5. Blondie

    Fave colour???

    Haha that’s true! I love lavender too
  6. Blondie

    Sad girl

    Hi @Blue22031 that sounds really horrible and not how friends should make us feel and you deserve to be treated well and with respect. Have you ever spoken to her about the way she treats you? And do your other friends notice this and realise what she's doing? We're here for you and we'll find a way forward.
  7. Romantic attraction can make you feel exhilarated, you might feel suddenly self-conscious, your heart can beat faster (I promise I'm not quoting from a cheesy rom com!). With sexual attraction, thinking of being intimate or having sex with that person feels exciting and something that you would like to do.
  8. Blondie

    Fave colour???

    Although I think my fave is actually teal / turquoise at the moment but I didn't have that option
  9. Hmmm, that is a little tricky. I know you're not out to your parents yet, but when you are, it might be worth explaining what he can be like so they can support you in spending less time with him outside of school. But that's not to say you should rush to come out - only do that in your own time.
  10. I love this advice!!!
  11. I realise I made an error in my response - I meant to say to keep talking / communicating with Marta. It sounds like you're unlikely to ever become close to Mia (and understandably given that she outed you) but you can keep and strengthen your friendship with Marta. I know it may not seem like it but it's very likely that Mia gets jealous when you spend time with Marta and has similar worries to you. Although that's not your responsibility and you cannot control other people's thoughts, actions and behaviours, we can be in charge of our own. One idea might be to have a dedicated and regular time that you spend with Marta - just the 2 of you, so that no matter who else is hanging out together, you will have that to look forward to. It doesn't even have to be weekly , it could be 2 weekly or once a month. Do you think you could suggest this to Marta?
  12. One way that can help is to write down all the things that you're worried about so they exists on paper rather than just swirling around inside you. You can also look at them objectively so it's a little easier to see what you can do for each issue. It can help to write down all the negative stuff and then rip it all up. Could you try this do you think? It can just as a starting point, to see how you get on.
  13. Hey @A human being it's completely natural to feel quite fluid on our attractions to people. Some people describe themselves as ACE which is an umbrella term for a variation of romantic and sexual attractions. It's something that usually works itself out over time but it's a huge positive that you are open to being attracted to / having a relationship with the person rather than their sexuality. Even for people who identify as bi, they can experience more of an attraction to one gender than another. And of course, you are right, we can be influenced by our heteronormative society. I think it's important to just take your time and see how relationships develop and how you feel with a particular person. Does that make sense?
  14. Hi @Pirate24 thank you so much for opening up with us and I'm so sorry that you were subjected to trauma like this (and I'll send you a private message too). As you may already know such an experience can affect our feelings and cause confusion about intimacy, relationships and attraction, but generally are considered not to determine our sexuality. Can I ask if you have ever begun to explore any of this with a therapist or counsellor?
  15. Hey @MoonieOwl you sound super creative! I wish I could sing but can definitely relate to your sister's sewing - it's so rewarding!
  16. Hey @Mammu I really relate to this as when I was in junior and then high school this happened with my group of friends. It's really common for some friends to be closer than others and for little clicks to form within friendship groups. These in turn can change as time goes on so it's pretty hard to keep up with and can really mess with how we feel. It's was a hard lesson that I had to learn to accept that my best / closest friends also had other friends who I wasn't close to and wouldn't always get along with. But equally I had other friends that were outside of this group and couldn't understand why my friends would sometimes feel left out. It's completely natural to feel jealousy and feel left out as our friendships can be the strongest and closest relationships we have and they therefore mean a lot. I would definitely suggest to keep talking and communicating - if you feel left out or feel that you're being picked on, definitely speak up if you feel confident enough to at the time, as you should't feel the butt of a joke when you just want to hang out with your friends. If you keep communicating with Mia, rather than waiting for it all to build up in a major convo, it could lessen the intensity and stress. What do you think?
  17. Hi @nobita Thanks for sharing with us and I know that dealing with skin problems can be so stressful. Even though we can feel so alone, it's incredibly common. This article might be a good start as it contains a lot of really useful information and advice: https://www.ditchthelabel.org/feeling-bad-about-your-skin/ It's really important to work on your self-esteem while you are dealing with this. Do you currently do anything to relax or boost your esteem?
  18. Hey @Blue22031 and a warm welcome!
  19. Sometimes a more casual 'side by side' conversation if you're just hanging out together can feel less intense than asking to discuss something with them. Do you think that could work?
  20. Hi @MoonieOwl Echoing Monsoon's response. It's important to understand your worth as a friend - first off, you deserve to be treated well and with respect. Secondly, it's sad but sometimes we do outgrow friends for all sorts of reasons and I wonder if this has happened here? We all change and grow and it sounds like he doesn't share your values at all and you shouldn't feel like you have to come out to him in order for him to show respect and acceptance for anyone who identifies as LGBTQIA+. When we hang out with friends, I know they can sometimes annoy us but we usually come away feeling better. What do you enjoy about hanging out with him? Do you think you might be able to gradually pull away from this friendship?
  21. Hey @Maybebaby and welcome to our community - I'm glad you found us! Thank you for sharing and it's great that you're taking the time to figure out how you feel. For many people attraction can be very fluid and may not fall into one category (for example, bi) - some people need to feel an emotional connection in order to feel attraction. However you feel, it's all completely valid. I'm sure you'll get a lot from other's stories and we're here for you.
  22. Blondie

    Hey!

    Okay! We've got your back!
  23. Welcome to our community @Mikayla this is a safe space for you to be yourself. I know how difficult this can be but it's important to weigh up possible consequences of coming out. For example, do you think there is any chance that you would be kicked out or your personal safety would be at risk? Let me know and we can chat more.
  24. Hi @vincent1996 I know confusing this can be to navigate. Had you noticed any changes leading up to this? How would you feel about texting / calling him to talk about it? It could be a simple as he's uninstalled WhatsApp, much like you came off social media. If you speak regularly and clearly value this friendship it's definitely worth trying to have a chat. It might be a simple misunderstanding or even unconnected to you. How does that sound?
  25. I ADORE pizza but also love salad so think I'd have to choose that!
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