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Blondie

Digital Mentor
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Everything posted by Blondie

  1. I would carefully ask her as it could be that she was mentioning boys to hint about her feelings and that she may not be ready for anything too heavy. It sounds like she trusts you so a careful conversation might clear things up for both of you so you know where you stand.
  2. Ah, okay I understand. Even so, I'm wondering whether changing yourself just to try and attract someone would be the best thing to do as ultimately you wouldn't be being yourself. It seems like a lot to give up and might be a lot of pressure to try and maintain.
  3. Hey @Ellie-may Feelings like these are incredibly powerful and exciting! So many people find that they are pivotal parts of our lives that they will always remember as quite defining, regardless if anything happens in the future or not with this friend. Even if nothing ever happens again between you outside of friendship, it doesn't in any way invalidate your experience or her's. What are your plans for seeing her? I would suggest trying to keep it light and casual (unless it's obvious that you both want more) - what do you think?
  4. Hey @Ellie-may I'm not sure there's a definitive way to not look straight as everyone is so very different. The LGBTQIA+ community is incredibly diverse in how people express their sexuality and/or gender. Can I ask if there a reason why this may be bothering you?
  5. Remember - we're here for you!
  6. This sounds like a plan! I know it can be a bit cheesy but trying to enjoy the moment is a skill that takes practise!
  7. Oh, the movie and learning Japanese sound amazing! I would suggest trying not to put pressure on yourself - allow your sexuality to develop in your on time and space, always thinking about who you are and not what other people may or may not want you to be. Maybe try and not look at the entire picture of your life and somehow try and 'solve' everything in one go, rather just work your way through at your own pace. This will give you the best chance of finding your true self. But always leave yourself space to change and grow and try to shift from thinking that you need to make a final decision. How does that sound?
  8. Blondie

    Hey

    What are you up to this week?
  9. Blondie

    Hey

    Oh basketball is cool! I really like watching that as it's so exciting and fast moving, especially when the games stops with just a few seconds running down on the clock.
  10. Blondie

    Hey

    That's fantastic and sounds so lovely! What's your favourite subject at school and what are you best at, at school?
  11. Blondie

    Hey

    That's a really good start - I would think that not being negative about yourself would be first? Then you are more likely to make friends if you are feeling better about yourself. As a starting point - tell me one thing you really like about yourself. It can be anything at all. Eye colour, handwriting, sport skills, being a good listener...anything. And why do you like that thing about yourself? I know it can feel uncomfortable thinking about the positive stuff as we're usually brilliant with negative things but to challenge this way of thinking and feel better it's just the start.
  12. Blondie

    Hey

    I can assure you that you are not a bother to anyone and we care very much about how you are doing. if you could make one immediate and positive change in your life - what would it be?
  13. Let us know how you get on - we're here for you when you need us.
  14. I would then for sure, trust your instincts and try not to worry (I know that's easier said than done!) Even in relationships people go through periods of not feeling attraction and will ensure they remain close on other ways. It doesn't have to mean anything bad, it's just a part of their life at that time. For some people, if this continues for a long time they may identify as Asexual. (A sexual orientation generally characterised by not feeling sexual attraction or desire for partnered sexuality. Although some people who are asexual do have sex). How does this sound?
  15. Thanks so much for letting me know - I'm very glad you're safe. When you reach out to these friends now are you being ignored? Do you think there's a chance that you could speak to any of them and have an honest conversation so you can move forward. Equally, friendship goes both ways and should ideally be balanced and/or complimentary - you deserve respect and communication within a friendship so I wouldn't want you to think that you should take the blame for everything that potentially didn't work out.
  16. Blondie

    Hey

    This is tough to navigate and can really affect how we feel. Sometimes when people are feeling really low it can be situational and other times they can be depressed. Would you be able to have a chat with your doctor about how you are feeling so they could rule this out?
  17. Hey @Ezra- thanks so much for sharing and I hear how bad you are feeling. Can I firstly clarify what you mean by not making it through the year? Your safety and wellbeing is a priority to us so please let me know. Moving like this and starting again is of course daunting but it can also be a positive; a chance for a 'fresh start'. Did your friends say that your feelings have affected the friendships?
  18. Hey @Laura2323 Just to let you know I replied to your question is Sexuality, Dating and Relationships.
  19. Hey @Laura2323 Just to let you know I replied to a similar post for you in Sexuality, Dating and Relationships.
  20. It really can be which is a shame as a lot of it is fun. if you ever need support in reporting abusive posts we have a service here that helps: https://www.ditchthelabel.org/report/
  21. Hey @Lesbian_Kila and we're glad you found us! Welcome! Our advice would always be to prioritise your safety at all times, so if for example, you think that you might at risk of being thrown out, then we would certainly advise waiting to tell them until you are out of home and living independently. I completely understand why you would want to share this part of yourself and we should all have the freedom to do that but your safety and security is key. How do you think they will react if you tell them?
  22. Hey @Random I think the overarching thing here is there really is no 'normal'. Our feelings an attractions for some never waver but for many they can change and be pretty fluid. Unless you have experienced a trauma which you feel could have had an impact on this I would trust your instincts and don't feel pressured to do anything with anyone unless it feels right and comfortable to you. Can I ask, does it only affect the 'attraction' type feelings or does the numb feeling also affect general relationships / friendships?
  23. Hey @Laura2323 it tends to be something that gradually makes sense. It's really positive that you're open to different attractions and to question how you feel so you will probably find that as you experience relationships and/or attractions, it will become clearer to you. For some people these attractions will often be fluid and can change through your life so I wouldn't be in a hurry to try and make any sort of decision now. Does that make sense?
  24. Hey @Laura2323 In one word - yes! It's completely normal and healthy and for many people this goes on throughout our lives. The obvious times could be in relationships, careers, potential parenting etc but so many people change and shift through their life. People shift career direction, political views and far more and if you think about it, it kinda makes life exciting rather than just reaching say, age 18 and knowing that you will always stay like this (even if you feel great then!) It's good to know we have room and space to change and develop as a person. Can I ask, is there a a reason you'd like to know now?
  25. Blondie

    Dilemma

    Hey there! yes, it is completely normal for our sexuality and attractions to be changeable and fluid. There is no fixed way to be.
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