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Digital Mentor
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Everything posted by Blondie

  1. Welcome to community! @Doofy
  2. You're welcome! Look at this as the first step of the journey and we can support you through.
  3. Hi @sarah_c That must have been so hurtful and I'm sorry that happened. Sometimes people can be thoughtless (and they don't always mean to be) and don't realise the impact of the things they say. It could be that they felt awkward or was even 'teasing' but even so it hurts as I wonder if they realised this was a genuine concern of yours. Is this something you've been worrying about recently? Can I ask - what made you ask the question?
  4. Blondie

    chit chat

    Hey, unfortunately it's not possible to share this information on our community. We have to ensure everyone's safety at all times.
  5. Blondie

    I just wanna talk

    Hey @Zookid How are you doing today?
  6. We're glad you found us @shadowkat55
  7. Blondie

    chit chat

    Hey, we will still find it..... In all seriousness - please don't share personal information on the forum peeps - it's to keep you safe.
  8. Blondie


    Sometimes it's best to try and choose a time when you have her full attention. When she's not too busy, ask her if you can find some time to have a talk. Obviously your family will have their own routines, but you might say for example on a Thursday evening "Hey, can we spend some time together on Saturday afternoon. I'd really like to talk to you about something and would really like your input." Adapt it to suit yours and your mom's schedules so you have her undivided attention which immediately removes a certain amount of pressure if say, she's tired. If it helps, have a few notes/prompters so you don't forget what you want to say and then try again. It's usually good to say what you want to say (i.e. I identify as.... this is really important to me... it would mean so much if you would use <insert the pronouns that you use) pronouns and/or if you would acknowledge and respect my identity. This way, out should open things up a bit. Depending on how you feel, you could ask if she has any questions - does she want to learn more - does she have any concerns? How does that sound?
  9. Hey @Ada I'm so sorry you're feeling so low and honestly, I get it. If we took at face value all the IG posts you would think that not one person has any sort of a 'flaw'. In reality those pictures are a quick snapshot in someone's life that was maybe 15 minutes max. The reality is the vast majority of people are completely normal (whatever that is) and living regular lives, even influencers and celebrities - that photoshoot or video they shared that looks perfect is far from perfect. Thankfully a lot more people are now speaking out with honesty about their personal struggles, whether this is with body image, mental health, low self-esteem or anything else. One thing that really can help is look at who you are following - unfollow the accounts that negatively impact how you feel as even though they may be intended to be inspirational, they can be anything but. Start following people that are outspoken or honest about body image, mental health or anything else that you really care about. Those accounts are far more likely to show the reality of their lives and to be honest about if they aren't feeing great or are struggling - things we can all relate to at some point. There are some really great suggestions here to start you off: https://www.ditchthelabel.org/10-inspirational-instagram-women-you-need-to-follow-right-now/ https://www.ditchthelabel.org/8-instagram-accounts-you-need-to-follow-to-make-your-social-media-a-more-positive-place/ https://www.ditchthelabel.org/6-inspirational-guys-on-instagram-you-should-follow-right-now/ https://www.ditchthelabel.org/11-instagram-accounts-that-will-make-your-day-at-least-107-better/ One thing that struck a chord with me was you mentioning that if you could only make all these changes you would be happier in some way... I spent years feeling like this and it's simply just not true. We have to work on ourselves all the time and looking 'prettier/thinner' at any point in my life, in my experience, was a fleeting feeling of being happy - ultimately there were still underlying issues of low self-esteem that needed to be dealt with. I can tell you with all sincerity that I know and have known so many people who on the surface look like they 'have it all together' but still deal with all the same issues of low self-esteem and not thinking that they are good enough, pretty enough etc. Sending you positive vibes.
  10. Blondie


    Can I ask how you've approached it before? Have you had a dedicated time to sit down together or just casually brought it up? It would be good to see if we can suggest an approach that might help.
  11. This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness
  12. It's a little like a UK version of baseball. It's a lot of fun
  13. GO SPORT! (Totally got away with people thinking I know all about football)
  14. This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness
  15. I'm so sorry to hear that happened but it's so positive that you recognise that you want to change how you feel. Initially it would be a good start to check out these 2 articles - have you already tried any of these things? Remember, we're here for you and we can work through it together. https://www.ditchthelabel.org/overcoming-low-self-esteem/ https://www.ditchthelabel.org/5-ways-boost-self-esteem/
  16. Blondie


    Hey, when this happens I would allow yourself to acknowledge that and to not try and force it. Many people who experience this say they cover/avoid mirrors as much as they can while they're feeling this way but at the same time, they try and remind themselves of all the things they do like/love about their body until the intensity of it fades or passes. As much as you are able to, practice self-care so do all the things that make you feel good. Does that make sense?
  17. Hi @XX2 and welcome to community! Self-esteem can be built up with time and working on it. Can I ask how long you've been feeling this way? And if you are comfortable to share, did anything in particular start the feeling off?
  18. Try not to rush it and put yourself under any pressure. Just take your time and explore how things feel and what felt right at that time.
  19. Great - remember you can always talk to us when you're feeling low or struggling.
  20. It sounds like you've done all you could to give him the best chance! No wonder you feel proud!
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