Running

Hey,

Thank you for sharing this with us. It is written so poetically and it is a poignant read. It sounds like you're carrying a lot of emotional weight at the moment, is that fair to say? How long have you been feeling like this for?

53 minutes ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

Thank you for sharing this with us. It is written so poetically and it is a poignant read. It sounds like you're carrying a lot of emotional weight at the moment, is that fair to say? How long have you been feeling like this for?

About a year. It has been off and on. Usually I can get past it, sometimes I can't take it, and I will go sit in a corner and cry until I don't feel like crying anymore, then I go to sleep. and have a fresh (or not so fresh) start when I wake up

Hey,

I can imagine it's been really tough for you to carry this weight around for so long, and it sounds like you're doing whatever you can to cope at the moment. I'm wondering, what'd your support network like? Where do you go for help?

I go to my girlfriend, and I write in a book about what im feeling, i never let anyone touch that book. and after the book is full im going to either let my parents read it or im going to burn it.

Other than that I have pretty much no support system.

 

You have us, what would it feel like asking for help? I know it is very scary.

3 minutes ago, Leilaaaa said:

You have us, what would it feel like asking for help? I know it is very scary.

Look, i've NEVER really "asked" for help, im not usually a "help" person asking for help feels like im pathetic, i usually just figure out a way to deal with it and move on. 

On 11/7/2022 at 2:21 PM, Julian Ali said:

I go to my girlfriend, and I write in a book about what im feeling, i never let anyone touch that book. and after the book is full im going to either let my parents read it or im going to burn it.

Hey there,

That's interesting that you may let your parents read it. What would you hope to get out of them reading it? What would you like to change if they did?

22 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

That's interesting that you may let your parents read it. What would you hope to get out of them reading it? What would you like to change if they did?

If they knew how I felt I think they'd be more open to discussing this kind of stuff with me. I'm the least favorite child, my younger sister is the "Golden Child" compared to her im nothing to them, i just hope it would open their eyes to the fact that i exist and have feelings.

Hey there,

From what you've said, it sounds like you really want to be seen, and we all want that. We all want a connection from those close to us. I'm wondering, could you maybe tell them some of the things from the journal? How might that go? 

20 minutes ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

From what you've said, it sounds like you really want to be seen, and we all want that. We all want a connection from those close to us. I'm wondering, could you maybe tell them some of the things from the journal? How might that go? 

They might be more open to talking to me and understand more, but then again they might shut me out even more, they might stop paying attention to me all together, worst case scenario, they make me go live with my aunt or grandparents who are even more homophobic than my parents and they never want to talk to me ever again. I just want to be loved for who I am. not for who they want me to be.

i feel so connected to you. same friend, same

some people are strong enough to relize that they are transdude, im just not

other than that, i feel the same friend, i feel ya

i hate being a girl because, well, uterus, but i am not a 

19 hours ago, Julian Ali said:

They might be more open to talking to me and understand more, but then again they might shut me out even more, they might stop paying attention to me all together, worst case scenario, they make me go live with my aunt or grandparents who are even more homophobic than my parents and they never want to talk to me ever again. I just want to be loved for who I am. not for who they want me to be.

Hey there,

I'm wondering, do you think it really is possible that they would make you go live somewhere else? Or would they recognise that you need help and try their best to support you? What do you think? 

38 minutes ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

I'm wondering, do you think it really is possible that they would make you go live somewhere else? Or would they recognise that you need help and try their best to support you? What do you think? 

If they get the chance they WILL make me live with my aunt, or grandparents.

13 hours ago, vega said:

i feel so connected to you. same friend, same

some people are strong enough to relize that they are transdude, im just not

other than that, i feel the same friend, i feel ya

i hate being a girl because, well, uterus, but i am not a 

Its called transman or transmasc, but yeah, glad u understand how i feel, i mean glad u understand but not glad you have the same problem.

On 11/10/2022 at 4:31 PM, Julian Ali said:

If they get the chance they WILL make me live with my aunt, or grandparents.

Hey,

I'm wondering, what makes you think that?